Unexpected Expectations (Completed)

Chapter 58

Kurt's POV

I blinked once, twice. My chest hurt from expanding with each breath I took. Nahihirapan akong huminga. Baka epekto na ito ng mga gamot na tinurok nila saakin. 

Apat na oras na lang. They want me to prepare.

Paano nga ba maging handa? Sana ganun kadali magpaalam sa mga taong mahal mo. I'm not sure what will happen inside the operating room. I'm not sure if I'll survive. Cause in the end, you will never be fully sure of anything.

I stared at my daughter who was sleeping beside me.

"Does it hurt a lot? If I'll kiss them, hindi na ba sila sasakit?" Inosenteng tanong niya.

"I already have medicines. Huwag ka na mag-alala. Daddy won't be hurt again. Hindi na sila sasakit." 

"But they have to inject you first. And it hurts."

I smiled to assure her that I'm not hurt. Raffy is just like me. The little and girl version of me.

"Dad, can you do me a favor?"

"Sure, everything for my princess."

"I don't know what is exactly happening cause Mom won't tell us. But I know what you've going through. You're sick, you can't eat properly, you can't walk, your throat is always dry, you need oxygen to breath." She paused and hugged me tight. "Are you going to heaven?"

Nagulat ako sa tanong nito. "If ever Dad will go to heaven. I will always look after you. The good thing is, it's 24/7. Daddy can save you from anything. No one can harm you." 

"My teacher said, heaven is far. Sabi din niya, hindi mo na raw makikita ang taong pumunta dun but they can see you. Is that true? Hindi na ba talaga kita makikita kapag pumunta ka na ng heaven Daddy?"

"Kapag wala na si Daddy, babantayan mo si Mama at ang kapatid mo ha? Hinding hindi mo papasakitin ang ulo ni Mama. Huwag ka magiging bad girl. Lagi niyong bibisitahin ni Raiford si Lolo at Lola. Tutulungan mo si Mama parati ha? Patatahanin mo siya kapag umiyak siya. At kikilatisin niyo ng maayos ng kapatid mo pag nakahanap na si Mama ng bagong Daddy. Hindi mo naman kakalimutan si Daddy diba? Lagi mong tatandaan, mahal na mahal na mahal kayo ni Daddy."

Raffy was just staring deeply at me. Halata sa mukha nito na hindi nito naiintindihan ang diretso diretsong tagalog na sinabi ko.

I just kissed the top of her head and hugged her back. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry if you have to see Daddy's difficulties."

**

"Honey, why are you awake na?" Helena's voice echoed the room.

"Nauuhaw ako."

She get me a glass of water and sat on the vacant chair infront of me.