Louis' P.O.V :
I sat with my head on Harry's shoulder as I let my tears fall. What have I done? I've ruined us, we're going to lose fans and it's all because of me. The band is going to just disappear. The publicity gone. What's Simon going to do if we start to lose fans because of this situation? Kick me out? He isn't going to be happy. Maybe I should take a break - just maybe. Should I?
Harry's arm was around me and he slowly rubbed my arm up and down. "Shh, Lou. Everything's going to be fine - I promise. We'll get through this."
"No Harry," I almost shouted as I sat up. "Everything's not going to be fine. It never will. Don't make promises you can't keep."
"It's going to be fine, Lou."
"It's easy for you to say, Harry. You're not the one that tried to kill themselves. You're not the one who's names all over the news because they tried to kill themselves," I didn't realise I had stood up and was pacing until Harry stopped me in my tracks by placing a hand on my shoulder.
"Lou, please - calm down," he said in a calming tone. "Come on, sit back down. Don't let it get to you."
I let out a laugh. "Don't let it get to me? The whole world knows what I done. Maybe it would just be better if I did die. I wouldn't be going through this pain now. Everyone would know and be sympathetic towards you guys and my family so they wouldn't ask questions."
"Don't talk that way, boo. Without you there would be no One Direction, please just calm down."
I sat back down on the sofa. My head in my hands. I was shaking. With anger? With fear? Because I wanted to cry? I have no idea. I felt a weight drop down on the sofa next to me, immediately knowing it was Harry when small circles were being traced on my back. "We will get you through this, boo."
"I've ruined everything," I muttered.
"No - you haven't. You haven't ruined anything."
"I have. I've ruined my life. The band. Our fan-base. Our careers. We'll all just disappear. A lot of our fans are small children - what if they hear about this and their parents stop them from listening to us - make us seem like bad people. What then?"
"They won't, Lou."
I heard someone sigh and get up. A few seconds later I felt a presence in front of me, but I didn't look up. I couldn't.
"Louis, please look at me," it was Liam's voice I heard.
Of course, Daddy Direction. I shook my head. "No!"
"Lou, please," he said.
I let out a long breath and looked up, meeting Liam's chocolate brown gaze.
"What?" I asked.
"Harry's right. You can't let this get to you. If you let it get to you, you may do this again," he said gesturing towards my arm. "All you have to do is face everyone with a smile on your face, okay? Act like nothings happened - just be Louis. When you come back home you can let all your emotion out."
"It's hard to do that."
"I know, Lou. I know."
"How do you know?" I questioned, curious.
"I just do. But we're all here for you, okay? You don't have to do this alone. We're One Direction. We're a team. Where one of us goes the rest follow. No one will bring us down. We will keep fighting for our place in fame. You haven't ruined the band, Lou. I promise you that."
"Okay," I agreed.
Liam was talking some sense and as much as I didn't want to agree. I did. They were here for me. He was right - where one of us goes the rest follow. They wouldn't ditch me because they felt like I was a burden. If I took a break - they would too.
"Good. Just remember - One Direction, we're a team."
I nodded and he hugged me.
**
My phone started ringing.
"Hello," I said pressing it to my ear.
"Hello, Louis," they said.
"Simon - hey. How's it going?"
"Not good, Louis. Not good."
"What do you mean?"
"You've became a burden on the band."
"O-okay," I said hesitantly.
"I hate to do this, Louis. But - I'm going to have to let you go."
"What do you mean?"
"You're fired. You need to leave One Direction."
"No!"
"You have to Louis. You don't want the others to suffer because of your actions, do you?"
"No."
"Then leave. Come up with an excuse to leave. Say you can't handle it anymore - you can't handle the fame. Just do something so they don't hate me for firing you."
"You can't do this..."
"I can! And I have."
"No Si -" I was saying until the phone line went dead.
He can't do this. He can't. He can't fire me. They're not One Direction without me.
"Lou, what's happened?" Niall asked walking into my room.
"I've just been fired."
"Why's that a bad thing?"
"Why's that no a bad thing?"
"You've became a burden to us, Louis. It's best if y -"
**
Harry's P.O.V :
I walked past Louis room on my way to bed. He had retired to his room about two hours ago when he calmed down enough. He'd let all of his emotion and anger out which tired him out completely.
I couldn't help but notice he was restless. Tossing and turning. Whimpering. Tangled in the bed sheets. I walked in his room and over to his bed, he was sweating. I opened the window to let some air into his room. It wasn't warm at all in his room but he was still sweating. Bad dream. Louis always been a one to suffer from them.
"Lou," I said shaking him gently to wake him up. He murmured before falling silent. "Lou," I said again, shaking him.
He awoke in shock and looked at me startled. "Harry."
"Yea. What's wrong? You okay? You seem to be having a bad dream again."
"Yea - but I'm fine Haz."
"Do you want to talk about it?"
"No, I'm fine. Honest."
"Okay," I said turning to walk out of the door. Something stopped me - a tug on my arm. "What is it, Lou?"
"Can you sleep in here tonight? I don't want to be alone."
I nodded. "Schooch over then," I said pulling back the bed covers. He willingly moved and I climbed in pulling him to my chest, I traced a line up and down his arm causing him to shiver but before long he had fallen asleep and I could here his light snore and feel his chest rising and falling. I listened to his snores and eventually drifted off myself.
A/N : Chapter 17 has arrived. Sorry for the wait :/ If you're confused - which I manage to do quite alot. The part in italic is a dream Louis having. Tell me what you think. Comment, vote, fan. Mary xx
