Now, by "kissed", I'm pretty sure we're not talking about just doing it because we can. If that was the case, this letter would be freaking dull.
The last girl I kissed, we just did it because we could. No feeling, no romance, just two kids satisfying their hormones on a whim. Not gonna say I'm proud of it, because I'd be lying.
As such, I will write this letter to the last girl I actually kissed.
So, yeah, basically, I've already written a few letters in this book to you. Not like you actually read them, I know. So these letters are more for me than for you.
We kissed... umm... like, February? First time, I remember it well. Lying on a beanbag, watching "Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure". Awesome movie, right?
I remember that you got pretty intense pretty fast. Within less than a minute, your tongue was halfway down my throat. In case you didn't know yet, that was the reason I pulled away so quickly. You freaked me out! I was literally scared!
But honestly, I couldn't get enough of you.
And just like that, we were practically together! I think you finally figured out that excessive tongue really wasn't my thing. I'm glad you did. I couldn't stand it if you kept doing it.
So, here we are, three months later. I remember that it was hardly a week after that when I figured out that you really didn't want to be together with me. I kept seeing you with that kid... the one with the funny hair. You sat close to him. You held hands with him. Yeah, I figured stuff out pretty quick. "Don't assume anything," people always told me, but it's hard not to assume anything when I see it happening right in front of my eyes.
So, I got mad. I dropped you, right then and there. You said, "I can fix this. I'll fix everything." But you didn't. In fact, now you're with him. Like, together. Full on.
So, about a month after that, we reconnected. Gosh, I missed you. You're the first girl I've ever crawled back to. It's just been kind of a crawl fest, hasn't it? Our relationship? First, you screw up, come crawling back, then I screw up, and crawl back. The difference is that I took you back, but you're just friggin DONE with me. What sucks the most is when I tell you how much I miss you, and you basically say, "Man, that sucks, I'm sorry." Nope. No more feelings for Tanner, right? Cause Tanner screwed up.
You know, maybe I should stop giving people second chances. They usually wouldn't do the same for me.
So here I am. I'm sorry.
I've never been so angry at myself.
