Dirty Magcon Preferences And Imagines 😜

Please Read ily

Hey guys. So I have been thinking about Alot of things. And I have also seen Alot of things. I know most of you are probably like "wtf is she talking about?" well to answer your question I'm talking about suicide. Now I know for a fact that most of you reading this have though about suicide. And that's fine. I'm not judging you. I have though about suicide. And I still think about suicide. So I'm gonna tell a little bit about me. Well first ny name is Breanna Monique Cavanaugh. I am mixed. My dad is black and my mom is Native American. I am 14 years old. MY birthday is August 18,1999. I love One Direction and Magcon more than I love life. Sooo about the suicide part. Okay so I'm in high school. I'm a freshman. And for those of you who aren't in high school yet it's not all bubblegum and lollipops. Its nothing like you see on tv. But anyway I get bullied. I have been getting bullied since kindergarten. That's almost 10 years. I get bullied for Alot of things. I get bullied because I Love one direction and magcon. People say that they are gay and blah blah blah. Whatever. U also get bullied because I'm fat and not even close to attractive. I'm just being honest. So Yea. Boys bully me more than girls do actually. Boys always tell me 'your stupid' 'your ugly' 'your fat' 'You should just die' 'your worthless' 'your pathetic' the list is just endless. And they are right. I'm all of those things. So I turned to some of the worst decisions ever. I started cutting. And cutting led to suicidal thoughts and attempts. When I started cutting I didn't think I would keep doing it. But I did. And it was just something that took the pain the pain away. Now I am telling you to cut yourself at all. Don't Do it. And the suicidal thoughts and attempts were something to get my mind off things. But that find help. I didn't actually tell anyone how I was feeling. One of my best friends found out. Her name is Jackie. We were at an assembly and I had my one direction wristbands over my cuts. And she saw the wristbands and started touching them. And I think she saw the cuts. She asked my what was that. And I said I don't know what she was talking about. So during the assembly they started talking about suicide And cutting. And then I started crying. She held my arm so I think she kinda cought on. So after that incident she started talking to me. And that's when one of my other two best friends caught on. And they are Natalie and Annette. But the best friend I have been knowing the longest is Natalie. That is my first best friend. I sent her a picture of my cuts and she called me and she was crying. I kept apologizing and she told me not to apologize. Then Annette came in. Annette and Jackie have kind of been in the same situation as me. So they know what it is like. So they started talking to me. They would tell me not to believe what other people said. Well that's kinda hard right? They would always tell me that I'm beautiful. And I NEVER EVER believed them. And I still don't. I don't believe anyone when they tell me in "beautiful" . Because people lie. They just tell me that so it can "make me feel better" well it doesn't help. Yea so that's when I started thinking about suicide. I would think about suicide Alot. And I actually thought about suicide about a week ago. Things just weren't going well at school or at home. But my friends kinda helped me. And I really appreciate it. So basically I'm telling you guys this. Don't listen to what people say. You are beautiful. You are worth it. Your not worthless. Your not pathetic. You are not what they call you. You are better. Self harm and suicide are never the answer. I promise. It gets better. Everything Happenes for a reason. As Jackie once told me "God gives his hardest times to his strongest angels" I am also happy to say that I am 3 week's clean of cutting. I thought about doing it. But I had to think about it. I made a promise to try. And I'm gonna keep that promise. But like I said before. If you ever think about committing suicide or cutting message me. I will always reply and I will do my best to help you whatever your going through. It gets better babe. Surround yourself with good people like I did. I love you guys so much. I never ever want to hear about one of you killing yourself. I don't know what I would do. So ilysm babes. And here is a little poem that I found and I though it was nice.

Jacob: Hush little baby.

Nash: Don't you cry.

Cameron: Don't cut your arms.

Carter: Don't say goodbye.

Mahogany: Put down that razor.

Jack J: Put down that light.

Hayes: I know it's hard.

Jack G: But you'll win this fight.

Matt: We'll be here.

Taylor: Through thick and thin.

Shawn: Have no fear.

Aaron: Find your strength within.

All: We love you. Please stay strong.

I love you guys to. Please don't give up keep fighting. Its hard but you'll win. I promise. Like I said if any of you need to talk I'm here. Just message me. I love you so much