Fix Me

Chapter 8

(Authors note: While writing Jades part in this I listened to the song "cry" by Alexx Calise. If you want to know how she's feeling/ what's going through her head at this moment listen to it.)

~Jade's P.O.V~

I'm done. I'm just done with everything. This is all just so stupid and pointless. I'm sitting here on my bed crying over a text my dad sent.

***

I was brushing my teeth. Cameron made me feel so safe last night and that feeling stuck with me. Suddenly my phone beeped indicating I had a text. Now I know what people mean by "I thought the world stopped and in that moment so did my heart".

I saw the caller ID said blocked number. There's only one person who I would've blocked.

"hey sweetie how are you. Oh never mind there's no need to tell me, see, I know that right now you're chatting with that nice fellow at the front door. He seems sweet. I'd hate to see anything bad happen to him...

-dad"

***

Now I'm staring out the window waiting for Cameron to come back from work.

Please be ok. I thought.

How? How did he find me? How the fuck am I supposed to be fine now? How is anything supposed to be alright?

Looking towards my bedside table I thought something I haven't thought about for a long time.

*it'll make everything better. You'll feel better afterwords. The deeper you go the better you'll heal.*

Trying to shut out the voices in my head I started pacing around the room. I can't let them get to me. Even so, I still keep stealing glances back at the drawer. My escape was in there for a long time. For a long time it's been my only source of therapy. Screwed up, isn't it?

Giving in I slowly walked over to the bedside table. It's as though I'm not even controlling my actions anymore. All I do know is that I need this.

*cut*

I see the blood start to peek through.

*cut*

It feels so good.

*cut*

I know it's wrong but I can't stop.

*cut*

Red is staining the carpet. It's everywhere.

It's not enough through. Walking over to the medicine cabinet I grabbed some pills. I then walked over to the kitchen and grabbed some vodka out of the liquor cabinet.

I walked back to my room and laid back down on my bed.

* you'll feel better after this. You won't have to deal with all this pain anymore. It's not like Cameron can really make all this go away right?*

*one*

I swallowed the pill.

*two*

There goes another.

And another, and another, and another... And another.

I start to feel tired and drowsy.

I grabbed the vodka a took a huge chug.

Then the world went black.

***

~Cameron's P.O.V~

Unlocking the door I walked into the house and, as my usual routine, I walked up to Jade's room to make sure she was ok while I was gone.

She seemed at ease last night though, like she finally relaxed. Smiling I opened the door and my smile quickly fell replaced by fright.