Fix Me

Chapter 5

Chapter 5

Ok now I know I'm not in my home town. I've been everywhere there and I've never seen this place before.

Cameron must've noticed my awestruck feeling considering he turned towards me and said, "you like"?

Ok I have to admit thus place is huge but there's no way I'm gonna give him the satisfaction of impressing me.

So with that in mind I just shrugged and nonchalantly said, "it's alright".

Yeah yeah, I'm being a bitch to someone who shows actual feelings other than anger towards me but, really. Strange boy offers me to stay with him at his house and then offers to buy me clothes. If y'all are trusting him you best be re-evaluating your life choices.

Anyways, I'm guessing this kid is rich. Like, he basically bought me anything I even so glanced at. You can only imagine the lengths I went through so that he didn't buy me everything in the mall.

So now we're back at his place and I'm standing in front if the closet he gave me, which is now full of everything every girl dreams of (except Ryan Gosling wasn't there).

I'm not used to this. To people treating me well and acting like they care. It's all foreign to me. Should I do something nice back or just say "thanks"?

Well I can't stay here and think about it now he probably already thinks I have issues. Don't wanna make him think my issues are so bad I have to stay in my room all day.

"Hey, are you ok?" He asked when he saw me.

"Oh yeah. Why wouldn't I be?"

"Well you seem to spend a lot of time in your room...hey you're bleeding" he came over to me and grabbed my arm looking at the blood leaking through my sweater.

Shit, I must've hit my arm against something, I can't let him see my arm.

"It's nothing I probably just scratched myself"

He looked at me like he didn't believe me but, thankfully, he didn't ask anything else.

***

Right now we're in the kitchen making dinner and Cameron keeps looking at me funny. Probably still wondering about my arm. The bleeding stopped and yet he still seems worried. I don't even know why, it's not like he actually cares.

I was reaching over for the salt when he saw how the cut really looked.

* I need to get better at hiding it around him* I thought.

I don't even know why I've never had this problem before.

"What's that?" He asked still looking at my wrist.

Quickly pulling down my sleeve I said "I told you I cut myself"

"With what exactly?"

"I don't know I probably scraped it against the corner of a table or something"

He knew I was lying. In a swift movement he grabbed my arm and pulled up my sleeve. Right when I expected him to look at me with disgust or anger, he hugged me...

Taking my hand he pulled me out into the living room and sat us together on the couch. He looked younger then. More vulnerable, more childlike. I was about to go into my defence when he stopped me by saying:

" you notice how there aren't any pictures around here? Of family or friends, I mean"

Looking around I did. I never really took in this place till now.

When I looked back at him and nodded he continued.

"I lived with my parents till I was about 8. My dad cheated on my mom when I was just a baby so I don't remember him. But my mom, she..." At this moment he looked really uncertain but then he looked at me and I saw the tears.

"I found her. I couldn't save her. She overdosed on drugs and died. Her suicide note said, it's all gonna be ok, but how? My dad was a deadbeat and my mom committed suicide. After that I was put in a foster home with this guy who would keep on hurting me, abusing me. I couldn't tell anyone. So when I was 16, I took off. No looking back. That's why I don't wanna see this happen to you. I don't want to know that I couldn't save you either"

Ok now I was the one crying. Without looking up at him I whispered "I'm scared"

"Of what?"

"Getting hurt"

"I would never let anything happen to you"

But he didn't know. he didn't know the real reasons.

And that's when I told him. I let it all out, no details left out. He didn't interrupt or look at me with pity. But rather he listened to me and showed sympathy. Maybe being alone isn't the best thing, maybe all I really needed was someone to talk to. I may regret telling him by the time the sun comes up but right now, this is all I need. When I finished he reached out and just held me tight and I realized, I held on equally as tight. And we just sat there like that, neither one of us saying a word, neither one of us had to. It was just us, here, together, and I don't think I would've wanted anyone else there beside me.

***

I woke up hearing a heartbeat and arms wrapped around me. I guess we must've fallen asleep last night. Carefully as to not wake him up, I got out of his hold and went to the kitchen. Deciding I should probably do something for him since he helped me last night so I'm making him breakfast. Hopefully I don't butcher this and poison the only person who actually cares about me.

***

"Oh look who finally decided to wake up" I told Cameron as he walked into the kitchen. I just finished making eggs, pancakes, and bacon. Needless to say I went all out. What can I say? I wanna be a good guest here.

"Oh look who cooks" he replied with a chuckle.

"I know it actually turned out well"

"I think that's for my taste buds to decide"

Honestly, it's weird but, I'm nervous about what he thinks. I don't want to have to take my only friend to the hospital at, what, 9 am.

"Wow that tastes pretty good" he said after taking a bite.

"Now why do you sound so surprised?" I joked.

He smiled. I love it when he smiles. It takes up his whole face, his eyes shine, and it even brings out the dimple in his left cheek.

And yes I do realize how creeper-like I sounded just then.

Things are really looking up.

***

We spent the rest if the day eating candy, drinking pop, and watching a bunch of old Disney movies.

I learned that his favourite candy is skittles and he learned that mine is twizlers.

I learned his favourite soda is Sprite and he learned mine is Mountain Dew.

I learned his favourite movie is Nemo and he learned that we actually have something in common.

I gotta say, it feels good not having to put up an act around someone, around Cameron I can just be me. I can just be Jade.