Hell to the No

Eye to Eye

I feel terrible by the time I scramble into the choir room. Though late, no one pays me much attention, except for Kaitlin, who has been giving me quizzical looks from the moment I stepped into the room. I avoid her gaze as I sit in my assigned seat on the end of the top riser. Chorus didn't matter much at this time of the year, we had already had our concert, and the choir director was giving us the remainder of our days to study for finals. It was all very relaxed. I'm not surprised when I spot Kait making her way up the risers to sit with me.

"Hey, what's wrong?" She asks as I pull out the physics I never got to study. I shake my head wordlessly. I glance up to see her giving me a concerned look. With a giant sigh, I let the notebook fall on my lap as I explain in a hushed voice that Roman was going to be out of town all summer, and that I went overboard with my emotions when I confronted him about it.

"Oh damn," she whispers, giving me a sympathetic pat on the arm. "Just talk to the guy at lunch after chorus. Start by apologizing, and maybe you guys can work it out," she suggests. I lean my head against her shoulder, my stomach wound into a tight knot.

"I know..." I whisper, "But I just don't want to face him again right now. I'm so embarrassed. First the stupid confrontation in the mall, now this." Kait puts her arm around my shoulders in comfort.

"Gotta do what you gotta do, babe." I chuckle feebly, appreciative of her support. As carefree as she was, she is a good friend, and a great listener.

"Thanks, Kait," I say with a small smile. She nods, and rubs my arm.

"You could do the project together over the phone. Or on a videochat... Which could turn out to be reeeeeeeeally fun, with Roman Spade," she ends with a devilish pervert-grin. I scrunch up my face as I laugh explosively, and probably a little too loud for the setting. Kait bites her bottom lip promiscuously as she wiggles her eyebrows at me.

"It would certainly make up for your pride, which got you into this in the first place," she emphasizes her point with an elbow in my ribs, her smile fox-like.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah..." I shoo her with a half-hearted flourish of my hand. Deep-and-caring Kait had been replaced by Normal Kait, I think to myself with a grin. I finally return to my studying as Kaitlin settles with messing with my shiny new hair, and I half-listen to her story about the amazingly sexy so-and-such-graders who took their shirts off during flag football in gym earlier today.

I shake knots and tiny braids out of my hair as I walk to lunch after chorus, wishing it were that easy to get the knots and twists out of my stomach. I sit at my usual spot next to Kaitlin in the big cafeteria, at one of the tables on the far end against the window that overlooks the courtyard.

"I found him," I whisper, spying the tall and dark-haired form of Roman strolling out of the kitchen doors and into the cafeteria with a green plastic plate of food. I stand nervously, setting my purse down onto the seat next to Kaitlin.

"Go get 'im, Tiger," she says motivationally, giving my ass a smack. I swat at her hand before scurrying out into the isle between rows of connected cafeteria tables. My nerves jump as Roman turns in the opposite direction and starts to walk away towards the other end of the cafeteria. My pace quickens with my heartbeat as I scramble as discretely as possible to catch up to him. Watching his swagger in front of me, my gut churns with a different feeling, born from the thoughts I normally have about Roman. So full of himself. So hubristic. Luckily, these thought of normality calm me. Slightly.

He ends up sitting at a table in the corner, next to Sage. They were the only occupants on one end, sharing the table with a pair of sketchy looking guys on the other. I couldn't help but notice the tables immediately opposite and beside were mostly full of bright-eyed girls. Sage nods his head in greeting to me as I stop to stand beside Roman, whose torso is turned to face Sage. I return the nod, and Roman twists back to follow Sage's gaze.