Dear No One (Wattys2017) (UNDER CONSTRUCTION)

Dear No One, Hold Me Closer

Knocking at the Baxter's front door, I leaned against the door frame to keep my knees from buckling beneath me.

It took Eric longer than expected to open the front door, in nothing but a pair of boxers. Any other time there would have been a part me that would have admired his body, but my mind was set on getting to Callum.

"I was worried you weren't going to come." He ran a hand through his hair, stepping out of the doorway. "Every time I knock, he turns the music up louder."

I kept my head down as he led me down the familiar hallway, the light above us flickering to a point that it had begun to strobe. He paused outside a black door with a Metal poster hanging off it, a Keep Out sign draped over the knob.

"If anything happens, call me or the police. I don't know what he's doing in there, but it's scaring the shit out of me. Help him, Kasey. Please." with that, Eric turned and walked off, ripping a towel from the dryer on his way down back to the living room.

I sucked in a deep breath and knocked, "Callum! Let me in!"

There was a part of me that believed he wouldn't hear my call and knock, that he might ignore it if he did. The feeling was proved wrong when the door clicked and creaked open.

My eyes immediately scanned the dark, tidy room for Callum. I had almost looked over him but stopped when I heard the sound of a bottle hit the ground. Stepping forward, I shut the door gently behind me so it would fall all the way shut.

He was hunched in the corner beside his nightstand, hoodie over his eyes, blonde curls a curtain over them. I had no doubt in my mind that he was drunk and high, I was just terrified to approach him.

"Callum?" I whispered, tossing my purse on to the made bed. He didn't budge or show any sign he had heard me.

I cleared my throat and spoke louder, "Callum, it's Kasey."

His fingers curled around a leg of the nighstand, head slowly lifting. The second I met his bloodshot, dilated eyes, I felt as if I'd be better off turning around and leaving. I had only seen the look a couple times before from Thomas; a careless, bitter look that had my insides churning.

"You came." He breathed, bloody lips parted, "Why'd you come, Kasey?"

"You called me." I started to crouch down, keeping a safe distance in case he lashed out. "Don't you remember asking me to come, Callum?"

He laid his head against the wall, "I remember. I just. . . nobody gives a fuck about me, Kasey. It's not like any harm would come if the drugs and alcohol were a lethal mix."

I moved closer, outstretching my hand. He took it shakily, staring at me through half open eyes.

"I care, Callum. Don't do this poor me crap. There are people that care, stop getting inside your head." I closed my hand around the bottle on the ground, relieved to find there was nearly half a bottle left. I pushed it behind me as I watched his eyes roam my face, his grip tightening around my hand.

"We should run, Kasey. You and me. I don't care where we go, I just don't want to be here anymore." Tears clouded his eyes as he dropped my hand, both of his falling to the floor.

"When we met, Callum. You asked what I was running from and I told you I was running toward something. I lied." I hoped a distraction would give me time to calm him down, "I was running from my parents, my brothers and sister, my life. I was and still am a child afraid to face the world. I couldn't face my demons, so I ran. I ran until I couldn't breathe, until I couldn't think."

He kept his eyes on me the entire time, lips opening and closing as if he were ready to speak then decided against it last minute. "It was my fault you had to live your life that way."

"It wasn't." I took his hand and squeezed it in between both of my own, "I chose to live my life the way I did, Callum. You can't keep blaming yourself for things you can't change or weren't involved with in the first place."

He shut his eyes, breathing heavily as he opened his fist in my hands.

"Do you hear everyone at school? It's all about the rapist and the victim. Do you know how fucked up that is, Kasey? Hearing everyone tearing not only me, but you down too? You shouldn't have to live in the past, you should be able to move forward, into the future. You can't do that with me here. Every time I look at you, I'm reminded of the chance I should have taken at that party and how differently your life would've turned out. I can't even imagine what you think when you look at me."

His voice wavered, bitterness laced in and out of ever slurred and shaky word.

"I see a broken boy trying to overcome his obstacles to become a man when I look at you Callum." I whispered.

"I'll never be a man. No man ever allows his mother to die, a poor, innocent girl to be raped. A man-"

"A man realizes his mistakes and does everything in his power to make up for them. A man understands that things happen in life that he can't and never would have been able to change." He kept his eyes squeezed shut, his jaw clenched.

"You don't understand, Kasey." he hissed through gritted teeth.

"I understand just fine. You don't think there are days when I wish I didn't have to crawl out of bed and face everyone and their first impressions of the poor little rape victim that lost her brother and can't get any true friends? The poor girl who runs a blog that the entire school and her siblings think is a joke? Sometimes I'll look at myself in the mirror, at the scars Aiden left on me, the ones left by the car accident. Sometimes I think I would have been better off not being saved."

When I turned my attention back to Callum again, his breathing had slowed and eyes weren't open at all.

"Callum?" I glanced down to find his hands beginning to spasm against the carpet.

"Callum?" my voice rose as I grasped his shoulders. His eyes shot open, but they were still and distant, as if he weren't in this reality anymore.

"Eric!" I shouted, throwing a look over my shoulder at the front door. I slammed my hand against the stop button on the remote beside us to shut of the low stereo, "Eric!"

Throwing my fingers against Callum's neck to check his pulse, I ripped my phone from my purse and dialed 911. Eric was in the room when they answered and ripped the phone from my grip, speaking into it as I fell back on to the ground in front of Callum.

I reached out and touched his neck to be sure he was breathing, only for him to begin thrashing around. Eric detained his brother and gave me a dark look, "Get out! Go home!"

"No."

"Kasey, I'm not asking you. You need to-" he started, but I stood and cut him off.

"He's my boyfriend, my friend, Eric. I'm staying." I heard sirens outside, and for a moment, Eric continued to restrain his step-brother, then broke free and threw his arms around my waist and hugged me against his chest so I couldn't see what was going on behind him. 

***AN***

Will be edited and extended into a longer chapter soon. 

Hope you enjoyed! 

Let me know what you thought! 

~ChasingMadness24