moonlight : luke

drunk

1:26 AM

as of 1:26 AM, i am the only one left that isn't drunk or knocked out.

michael is lying down on the sand, sleeping, calum disappeared with the girl whom he told had beautiful nostrils, ashton went back inside our room, and luke and i are still here by the bonfire.

he's drunk, i'm not.

"ky." he whispers.

"hmm?" i ask, facing him. the light from the bonfire illuminates the side of his face. that's what i call an aesthetic.

"i have to admit something." he says, still whispering, as he scoots a bit closer to me.

"yeah? what's that?" i say, my heartbeat getting faster.

"pinky swear with me that you won't tell anyone." he says, placing the bottle of beer on the sand before holding out his left pinky.

i hand my right on out before pinky-swearing with him, "you can trust me, monkey."

"i feel a bit lonely sometimes." he says, staring at the sand.

fuck.

"why's that?" i ask, feeling a little pain in my chest.

"cause i live alone in my apartment. when i wake up, no one's there to greet me good morning or ask if i'd like some coffee," he sighs, "i take trips to the grocery alone, all i do is scroll through my phone all day because i have no one to do anything with."

i was about to reply but he speaks up again.

"sometimes, i feel so damn lonely that i find myself using omegle," he chuckles, "sometimes, i feel so lonely that i'd just stare at my wall or my ceiling, half expecting that it would talk to me."

what i said: "luke, you're drunk. you get very emotional when you're drunk, you should probably go to bed now."

what i wanted to say: "i'd never make you feel lonely. i'd greet you good morning everyday and make you coffee without asking you if you want some. i'd go to the supermarket with you even though it's past 12 AM. i'd go on omegle and do a hunt to find you. i'd like to learn how to put spells on inanimate objects such as your walls and ceilings, so you could talk to them. just so you wouldn't feel as lonely as me."

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— au