ALMOST A BRIDE (Open On Annie)

15

I felt torn. (Again!)

I’d make a promise to myself that nothing was going to happen between us. My brain was saying no, but my body was screaming yes. (Aren’t those the lyrics to an R&B song? If not, they should be.)

This vacillating was getting exhausting, and quite frankly, I was starting to feel like an idiot. It was immature, to say the least. But since ‘Nipple Gate’, it had felt like that grown up part of me that had relationships and sex had been missing in action, leaving behind this insecure Annie. 

But right now it was time to suck it up, be an adult, make a decision and stick to it.

No sex with Chris! No sex with Chris!

The shower finally came to an end and I found myself feeling extremely relieved.

“So, I’ll take the couch tonight and you can take the bed?” I heard Chris start brushing his teeth, and I was struck by how intimate this all was.

The bedtime routine.

Washing, brushing and climbing into your pajamas. This is something you’re meant to do with your partner, not a stranger.

“I can take the couch, it’s very comfortable.” I said.

“I wouldn’t be a gentleman if I let you sleep on the couch Annie. Take the bed.”

The point was that I didn’t want to sleep in the bed. His bed, with his scent lingering on the pillows. But I really didn’t want to explain all that to him either, so I accepted graciously.

I climbed into the bed cautiously, soon discovering that is was in fact the biggest, softest bed I’d ever been in, and yes, the smell of Chris lingered. The earthy sandalwood from his perfume, combining with the smell of sweet shampoo, and soap.

Chris climbed onto the couch and turned the lights off. We lay in darkness for a while, and I was acutely aware of him breathing, shuffling and moving his pillows around.

“Are you comfortable on the couch?”

“Yes. Very.”

There was a pause.

“If I'd said ‘no’, would you have offered me the other side of the bed?” I could hear the twinkle in his voice and I smiled. Here we go again- sexual innuendos and loaded witty banter.

“Maybe” My voice teased him.

“Shit! I should have said I was uncomfortable!”

“Oh well, your loss.” I was smiling like an idiot and was glad for the cover of darkness.

Chris chuckled, “Maybe it’s actually your loss!”

“And how do you figure that?”

“I’ve been told my spooning abilities are pretty good.”

Now it was my turn to chuckle, “Good night Chris.”

“Night Annie.”

I closed my eyes and must have fallen asleep quickly; the bed was warm, the smells were pleasant and having Chris in the room felt comfortable.

I’m not sure how long I’d slept for when I was woken up by the sounds of tying.

I opened my sleepy eyes and looked up to find Chris slouched over his computer. The usual menagerie surrounded him, his ipad and a few coffee cups, a Coke and a chocolate. It was as if he had built himself a little nest.