Chapter Thirty One

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Amber studied the stencil she had created as she drew the tattoo design onto the twenty something customer's stomach in her chair.

"You look so much better than you did on that TV show" the blonde customer observed, trying to get Ambers attention.

Amber didn't hear her. She was focused on getting the tattoo done.

"I always thought you were pretty cool, you know? I could never understand why you weren't taken by now"

Amber looked up, making eye contact for the first time. "I was looking for someone specific for a long long time" She replied.

"So, you're single then?" The girl asked, with an eager smile now on her face.

Before Amber could answer, Rachel caught her eye from the office door, she was ushering her over.

"Sorry" Amber apologised to the customer "keep still" she told her, removing her latex gloves and throwing them in the bin "I'm needed a second"

"No problem" The girl responded, watching Amber walk into the back room. She had the Lara Croft look going on today, black boots, short shorts but with a loose fitting green top.

Amber found Rachel sat in her office chair, spinning around and eating a chunk of an apple with her mouth open.

"You got a call" She declared, with a crooked grin caused by the apple between her teeth. She  whirled her hand around her head mouthing "psycho"

Amber knew it was Drew. She had expected the call. She had thought Sam may have changed her mind, and not wanted to know more, as many months had passed since she had seen her in Paris.

"Drew" Amber acknowledged, putting the phone to her mouth. She pushed Rachel out of her seat and shooed her away. Rachel stuck her tongue out before heading back to Amber's client who did not look impressed that Amber hadn't returned to finish her draft design.

Amber shut the door for privacy.

"How did you know it was me" Drew asked.

Amber smiled at the image of Rachel moments previously "Rachel told me"

"Of course she did, listen Amber I'm not sure how to tell you this" Drew began.

"You got a call out of the blue from someone claiming to be Sydney" Amber said matter of factly.

"You too??" Drew shouted. "I thought it was a psycho at first pretending to be her"

She could talk, Amber thought to herself.

"No Drew... it is... her. It's definitely her"

"What the fuck is going on?" Drew asked getting agitated. "I can't cope with all of this. I thought she was dead Amber. I've grieved her"

"She lost her memory Drew, that's why she never came back"

Amber felt uncomfortable in the silence that followed her comment.

"Still there?" she asked as she lifted her legs onto the desk, her black boots crushing Rachel's paperwork pile.

"Yeah I'm still here. She doesn't remember a thing? I mean on the phone it was brief. Her baby woke up and she had to call me back so I called you straight away"

I winced at her comment. I had mentally told myself again and again that it was just her body, she was not Syd, and yet the mention of her baby and the fact Drew had spoken with her minutes ago made me want to know how she was.

"Nope not a damn thing, be prepared and don't get your hopes up. I mean it's her, but it's not really her Drew. Sydney has gone. She won't remember you. I gave her your number because I'm hoping you will help her okay? To fill in the gaps she's missing about her life as Syd"

"Why aren't you helping?" Drew asked.

"I can't. I'm doing what I should have done years ago. I'm laying her to rest. She doesn't need me. She just needs some answers and you can give her that. I'm done Drew, she's gone now, and it's not her anymore"

"Shit dude, that's some serious denial you got going on there"

"Not denial. Honesty for once in my life. It's not healthy for me or for her. You guys can perhaps retrieve a friendship but I'll never retrieve the Sydney I married, and the Sydney who loved me...she was gone a long time ago"

"I can come and be with you if you need to get out and get some beers, or sit in and just talk. I'll be there tonight if you need me"

"Drew we don't need to pretend. We stopped talking a long time ago"

"But I never stopped missing you. Do you have someone? Did you meet anyone?" Drew asked.

"I did once. Goodbye Drew. I hope you guys can be friends. I think she would like that. Sam needs that"

"You still love her don't you" Drew stated under her breath.

"Always" Amber answered solemnly, before clicking off.

She dropped the phone back onto its cradle. Swigged a bottle of water and chucked it into the waste paper bin. Her cell phone buzzed in her pocket, and she clocked the name. It was Marie. She hesitated before picking it up.

"Hey" She answered quietly.

"Hey Amb. I know I said I wouldn't call, and I know I said some things that were out of order, but for what it's worth I'm sorry I fucked up so badly with Sydney. I really am sorry, and of course for the voicemails. The messages and stuff. As you know I drunk dial like it's an Olympic sport."

"Marie, Its okay. I'm over it. I get why you were upset. It all ended so abruptly and messy and I'm sorry. It's not how I would have liked to have ended things in normal circumstances"

"I've missed you Amb. Truly. Haven't seen you on the scene in months. Are you doing okay? Nobody seems to have heard from you. I was getting concerned"

"Ive missed you too. I stopped doing the DJ work when I got home from Paris.  I've just kept myself to myself. I packed up the apartment and moved back to the beach house. I'm going to rent it out and move away for a while. I need a change"

"Wow, you really are moving on aren't you?" She finally responded, after a pause.

"Trying" Amber told her, taking a deep breath.

"Want my help" She asked.

"I'm good. I need to do this for myself" Amber replied honestly.

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