Chapter Three: Blame

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I knew from the moment he looked at me that we were not about to have a friendly conversation. The dark look in his eyes, the vacancy, the fury, was all so overwhelming. I couldn't unsee it, because it was so clear - he hated me.

"What the fuck do you think you're doing?" he spat. "Do you even realise the consequences this has? No, you don't, because you're just a child!"

I took a step away from him. He was scaring me.

"I'm sorry, I didn't know-"

"That you're what - sixteen?"

"Seventeen," I said under my breath. 

"Where's the difference?" he sighed. "I need this job. I have a son who depends on me to support him - a son I intend to be able to send to college one day. If I lose this job because of you, I won't get a job anywhere else. There will be a black mark next to MY name. Not yours, mine. You will be a victim, and I, your predator. Do you - DO YOU EVEN KNOW WHAT YOU'VE DONE?" he yelled.

I didn't answer. Even if I wanted to, I'm not sure I would have been able.

He came closer to me. I was leaning against my desk, there was nowhere I could go. I couldn't back away this time. 

"Who have you told?" he asked, his voice lower, but in no way calm at all. I could hear the anger shake through his words. 

I couldn't look at him. I wouldn't.

"No one," I whispered.

I caught a glimpse of him raising his hand, and then I felt a sharp sting on my cheek. 

"Do not lie to me, Allison."

I looked up at him. Tears welled in my eyes and he became nothing more than a blur.

"I'm not lying," I said. "I haven't told anyone, I swear,"

"Girls like you don't keep things like this to themselves. You talk. You gossip. You brag. You're all the same. You're just another slut."

"I'm sorry," I said. It was barely more than a whisper.

He stared at me with cold, cruel eyes, then looked away, shaking his head. 

"I can't even look at you right now. Just - just go. Get out," he ordered.

I didn't hesitate. I picked up my books and left.

...

When I arrived home, Ben greeted me as he usually did. The little tyke ran at me with full force and squeezed my legs tightly. I even smiled a little.

"How was your first day, Benny?"

"It was fun," he said.

"Good," I ruffled his hair. "You're such a great boy, you know that?" 

He grinned, nodding his head. 

"I love you, Ben," I bent down, kissing his little head.

"Agh, germs!" he squealed, wiping his face with his tiny hands. 

I grinned, watching him as he ran off, back towards the pile of toys in the corner. I walked up to my bedroom and closed the door behind me. I leaned against it, closing my eyes, feeling tears threaten to fall. 

I couldn't stop thinking about him. His words repeated themselves in my head over and over. That look in his eyes - pure hatred - burned in my memory. I disgusted him. 

I never wanted to see him again. And in a way, I didn't. The James I had met that night was kind, sweet, charming... but this was a completely different man. 

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