the weight of living; c.g.

[1.7]: extraction

"No more running away, alright?" Rick let us go back to bed, but not before delivering those words, looking straight into my eyes. I nodded and turned away, bringing Grace with me.

"Are we really going to stay?" Grace whispered to me as we laid back down for bed.

"We've gotta give it a try." I stared up at the ceiling and then let myself fall asleep, the first time in a week I hadn't had to sleep with Judith in the sling.

Dreams came to me like leaves on the wind, brief and fleeting. Images of my past life were scarce, mostly scenes of now flashing behind my eyes. An indescribable panic rose in me as I watched, the hordes of biters advancing and teeth snapping. Above it all, a baby cried.

I woke up sweating, as usual. The place we chose to sleep in was near the stained glass windows, casting strange colored light onto us in the morning. The church wasn't silent as I awoke, everyone moving around and eating makeshift breakfast.

I decided to join, getting up carefully as to not wake Grace. Rubbing the sleep out of my eyes, I stepped over to the table holding the food. The most appetizing thing was canned peaches, which wasn't saying much. I sat down in one of the pews and opened the can.

As I scooped the peaches out with my fingers, Carol came and sat next to me. The moment I looked at her eyes, I knew she had heard about Grace and I's attempt at leaving.

"I heard about last night." She said and I resisted the urge to groan. I already got the lecture from Rick, I didn't need this.

"You and your sister are part of the group. You don't need to doubt that." She put her hand on my shoulder in an attempt to be comforting, unfortunately, it was my wounded one. Involuntarily, a hiss of pain came through my teeth.

"What's wrong?" Carol lifted her hand, studying me worriedly.

"It's fine." I tried to wave it off, going back into the can for more peaches.

"No, it's not. What's wrong?" Carol was determined. Sighing, I shrugged off my jacket, revealing the bandage.

"What happened?" She looked from the bloody gauze to my face.

"We got held up on the way here. Some guys tried to stop us on the road. They shot me." I explained, feeling a little uncomfortable with the reveal of my wound.

"Have you treated it?" She looked so worried. It wasn't that big of a deal, I didn't want anyone fussing over it.

"I mean, I wrapped it up." I averted my gaze, finding my boots suddenly interesting.

"We need to treat it. It's going to get infected." She stood up.

"I'm okay, really." I tried to convince her, but she was already walking over to where Rick stood talking with Maggie and Glenn. She had a short conversation with him, occasionally glancing over at me.

"Bridget, why didn't you tell us? We've got to get that bullet out." Rick said as he followed Carol back over to me.

"I didn't want to waste resources." I looked down at my peaches, appetite gone.

"Come on. Maggie's gonna fix you up." Rick gestured for me to get up, to where Maggie was gathering supplies.

"Unwrap it for me, okay?" Maggie told me as she turned back around to grab something. I plopped down on the chair and started taking off the bandage. When I got to the bottom layer, it was disgustingly sticky and the smell was less than desirable.

"Alright. This is going to sting a little." She had a cotton ball with some liquid on it, ready to apply. I nodded and braced myself. It didn't hurt too much, but I had to clench my teeth a little.

"You're lucky it ain't infected." Maggie looked down at me with a smile, which I returned weakly.

"It looks better." Grace appeared next to me, apparently done sleeping. Her eyes were still droopy with sleep, but her grin was bright as she sat next to me.

"Hey, you don't have to watch this." I eyed Maggie's preparation for bullet removal as I spoke to Grace.

"It's okay. I can hold your hand." Her hand slipped into mine, giving the extra reassurance I needed.

"Okay. I gonna try to get it out, alright?" Maggie locked eyes with me, looking for permission. I gave a small nod, staring straight ahead. She let out a small breath and put her hand on my side of my shoulder to steady it.

"One, two, three." She counted down, going in with the tweezers on three. As soon as they touched my open flesh, I cried out, clamping my head over my mouth as she dug into my skin.

"I'm really sorry, Bridget. But I have to get it out." Maggie focused on the task at hand, apparently finding the metal. She grasped it between the tweezers and pulled, wrenching it from my skin. As she put it on the table behind her, I released my death grip on Grace's hand and let out a long breath.

"That wasn't so bad, was it?" Maggie started cleaning up the blood coming from the wound.

"Oh yeah, you're telling me." I grinned, one of the first in a while. She laughed and wrapped up the wound.

"Are you gonna be okay?" Grace asked, her hand going up to touch the bandage.

"Of course." I mussed her hair and stood up to go get the can of peaches I left in the other pew. As soon as I was up, I felt the dizziness of the earlier blood loss, gripping the table to catch my balance.

"I'm okay." I reassured Grace, gaining my composure and walking, albeit a little wobbly, over to the pew. There were a few peaches left in the can, which I gave to Grace for breakfast.

I was helping clean up breakfast as they gathered groups for a run. Originally, I volunteered to go, but one look from Rick shut down that idea. It was probably for the best, I needed to watch Grace anyway.

After the groups left, I didn't know what to do. Leaving the church was dangerous, at least without someone to have your back. Staying behind was the only option.

In the other room, I had found paper and crayons, immediately thinking of Grace. She used to love drawing, before all of this. Of course, it was marker on the walls then, but I still thought she might enjoy it.

"Grace? Can you come in here for a second?" I called out into the main room, where I knew she was helping Rosita organize the cans. In just a few seconds, she appeared in the doorway, head tilted in questioning.

"When you're done with the cans, would you want to these to draw with?" I held up the paper and package of crayons for her to see. Her mouth opened into one of the widest grins I've seen from her in a while. She closed the distance between us, engulfing me in a bear hug.

"After I'm done? You promise?" She pulled away, bright eyes looking into mine. I nodded, an infectious smile of my own creeping onto my face.

"Alright, back to your work." I let go of her, patting her tangled hair. I watched her leave the room, a subdued grin glued onto my face.