A Muslim's Romantic Journey

Chapter 6.

*Insecurity is a BIG problem in society these days. The media are constantly showing us how we need to look to be 'beautiful.' Slim, fair, tall etc. It's all false! This chapter contains a reminder for us all. As Muslims, be grateful for who you are and what Allah has blessed you with. If you think you have a large nose or goofy teeth, do not despair, you are beautiful! And whether you're Muslim or not, beauty is in the eye of the beholder. You look the way you look because someone loves or will love you just the way you are. Everyone! You are BEAUTIFUL! (And don't think that a man will find your insecurity attractive. Insecurity is annoying, Modesty is attractive)

---

Safia's POV

I sat in shock. I couldn't believe what I was hearing. I thought everything was going well. I had gone in, sat down. His mother and I made polite conversation. Hafsa walked in after me as I had asked her to for support. After Hamza left for a phone call, my mum made those eyes, indicating for me to leave. When I left the room I was buzzing with excitement. Abubakar seemed like a really nice guy. His parents were amazing. I was ready to say yes until they called me into the dining room and broke the news to me.

"Er... He... Erm... Well... Do you like him Safia?" Uncle Yahya asked.

"Yeah. Why? Why do you sound so nervous? They rejected me didn't they?" The way uncle spoke gave it away. My throat tightened.

"Not exactly... He's now asking for Hafsa's hand in marriage." I completely froze.

"WHAT?" Hafsa shouted. She was sitting next to me as I held onto her arm. She yanked her arm away from mine and marched into the next room. Uncle Yahya should have known this was going to happen. Hafsa lost her temper. "YOU DID NOT JUST DO THAT!" She screamed at Abubakar. There were gasps and murmurs.

Different voices were saying similar things such as ‘Hafsa!’ ‘Stop!’ ‘What are you doing?’ But Hafsa continued

"WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE? SAFIA'S WAY TOO GOOD FOR YOU ANYWAY!" I would have been flattered that Hafsa was standing up for me, but I was just upset. It happened again. I pushed past everyone coming in my way trying to calm me down. They knew of my insecurities, they knew what affect this would have on me. I nearly knocked Samiya over as I made my way to my room and slammed the door shut. I liked him, but I wasn't in love with him. What was really making me upset was that he had chosen Hafsa over me. Well of course he would have. I faced the mirror, disgusted at my reflection. 

"Why? Why are you so ugly?" I asked myself. "Why can't you be like Hafsa?" I could feel myself getting angry. "Why are you so pathetic and useless?" I knew I shouldn't be saying this but I carried on. "You thought he'd say yes to you? Just accept it! No one will ever love you!" I walked away from the mirror and curled up unto the corner of my room and began to sob. I could faintly hear people talking downstairs. I could hear Hafsa getting told off. Then I heard people leave. A while after the front door shut, the house went silent. Then I heard Hafsa coming into my room.

"Safia, I'm so sorry." She said putting a hand on my shoulder. I flinched.

"It's not your fault you're beautiful and I'm a troll."

"Don't say that!"

"It's true though! It's like the whole Talha thing all over but on a much larger scale." In my college days with Hafsa, there was a boy named Talha. He was handsome and religious. We had spoken a couple of times regarding charity events. I ended up having a crush on him, being the hormonal teenager I was. One day he approached us with his friend. I began getting butterflies and a smile formed on my face. It turned out; he had approached us in order to propose to Hafsa. Hafsa then gave him a piece of her mind, like she had done so again today.