Keeping up with the Oxensteirnas

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I'm funny sometimes

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I'm funny sometimes

It was a hectic mess at Lukas and Arthur's place when Berwald and Tino showed up.
Peter was currently running around the house, arms outstretched like an airplane and Emil was chasing after him angrily, still wearing his pyjamas.
Lukas and Arthur were bickering, not paying any attention to the child because they were bad parents/babysitters/older siblings.
"I told you to take out the bloody trash!" Arthur shouted in British.
"Fine then!"
Arthur started to float away. He drifted through the door and into the dumpster outside.
Emil stopped chasing Peter and blinked at the scene in confusion.
"Did a troll just carry Arthur out of the house or are the pregnancy hormones getting to me?"
"Pregnancy hormones? You're pregnant?" Lukas caught on fire, he was that peeved.
"Yeah...me and Leon wanted kids."
"You're nineteen! Too pure!!! Too young!!!"
"I'm nineteen. An adult."
"If your age is on the clock, then you're too young for cock."
"Clocks only go to twelve."
"Military time!!!!!"
"Daddy! Mommy! You're back!" Peter skipped up to Berwald, grabbing onto his leg. The Swede knelt down and petted the boy on the head.
"Was he good?" Tino asked, sugar in his voice.
"He was an asshole." Emil groaned.
"Speaking off assholes; how could you not tell me you had a baby coming out of yours!?"
"Because you'd freak out."
At that point, Arthur walked back into the house, garbage hanging off his clothes and hair.
"What the hell was that for?"
Lukas only laughed.
"Well then..." Tino chirped. "It seems you guys are busy...so we'll just be going!"
"Thanks for babysitting Peter." Berwald added.
"Anytime." Lukas nodded.
"No! Not anytime. He's a dickhead." Emil objected.
"You're a dickhead."
"Shuttup."
Tino laughed awkwardly before snatching Peter up and hightailing it outa there.
Berwald was grateful for the exit.
Cuz that family was hella weird.

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