The Riveting Lives of Russell and Sal

Deleted Scene - McDonald's

Russell couldn't go to that McDonald's anymore.

He worked Sundays after church. To recuperate from the hell that was church, along with the hell that comes with working in the food service industry, Russell liked to treat himself to McDonald's during his lunch break. It was just across the street from his work, and it gave him something to look forward to. Russell always ordered the same thing. A Quarter Pounder with no onions, large fries, and a large Coke. He'd get it to-go so he could eat it in his car. He'd feel awkward just eating it there by himself, and everyone would see he was eating by himself. The ordeal was too stressful.

Like every Sunday, the same cashier took his order. She was young and petite, with long black hair tied back in a ponytail. In a cheerful voice, she said, "A Big Mac with no onions, large fries, and a large coke? To-go?"

Russell's breath caught in his throat. A million thoughts shot through his mind. How did she remember my order-Do I really come here that often-Does she think I'm weird for always ordering the same thing-Is it weird that I always order the same thing-I never want to order anything else-Is that normal-Do people think it's normal-To always order the same thing-What am I supposed to say to this girl-I don't even know her name! He read her name tag. Angela.

"Er, yes," Russell said, handing Angela a $20 bill with sweaty palms.

She handed him his change and receipt. "Have a nice day!"

As Russell waited for his food, he gnawed at his thumbnail while more questions ran through his spinning head. What's going to happen next time I come here-Will she remember again-Will she expect me to say more than 'Er, yes'-What would I even say-Is she going to try to strike up a conversation with me-What if she likes me? Russell watched her take an old man's order, all smiles. She's cute, I guess, but Sal is cuter. Oh God, how would I say I'm not interested? I don't want to tell her that I have a boyfriend!

Russell was relieved when his number was called. As he walked out carrying his bag and his drink, he came up with the perfect solution.

I will never go to that McDonald's again.

"So that's why I can't go to that McDonald's again," Russell said.

He was in his car, talking to Sal on his phone, sharing his worries about Angela memorizing his usual order.

"You worry too much. She was probably just trying to be friendly. You're a customer, after all."

"Yeah, maybe you're right," Russell said. "But what would I even do next time?"

"Hand her money and say 'thanks, you too.'"

"But what if she tells me to enjoy my meal?"

"Then just say thanks."

"But what if I don't realize it until it's too late?"

"I'm sure you're not the only person in the world who says 'thanks, you too' in response to 'enjoy your meal.' And even so, she probably wouldn't notice."

"But-"

"Do you pay attention to every word your customers say?"

Russell nibbled his thumbnail. "No."

"Exactly," Sal said.

"But she didn't even remember it right. She thought I got Big Macs, but I always ask for Quarter Pounders. Now what do I do if I go back and order a Quarter Pounder? Or if she keeps assuming I want a Big Mac. I'd have to correct her. I don't want to correct her."

Sal didn't respond.

"Anyways, it doesn't matter because I'm not going back there... Oh shit."

"What?"

"She'll notice I don't go back there anymore. Then what?"

"You're worrying over nothing. Everything will be fine," Sal said. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

As soon as they stepped inside the McDonald's, Russell remembered why he had stopped going to that McDonald's.

Russell swore under his breath.

"What? What's wrong?"

"Angela!"

Sal gave Russell a confused look. "Who?"

"The girl who remembered my order that one time. And then I vowed to never come back here again. But I have. And she's here."

"She's probably forgotten all about you by now."

"I don't know what to order now. I always get Quarter Pounders but she might recognize-"

"I can help who's next," Angela said in the friendly voice most retail workers are forced to use. Sal walked up to the register and Russell reluctantly followed, thumbnail in mouth.

"Hey! I haven't seen you here in a long time. Where've you been?" Angela asked upon seeing Russell.

Now Russell really didn't know what to order. If he ordered something different, she would most likely point out that it was something different. But if he ordered a Quarter Pounder, she might realize that she had memorized his order wrong. Russell continued biting his thumbnail.

"I'll take a McChicken, no mayo." Sal gestured towards Russell, thumb still in mouth, looking anywhere but at Angela. "My buddy here will take a Quarter Pounder with no onions. Also, two large fries and two large drinks, please. To-go."

As they waited for their food, Russell, no longer chewing on his thumbnail, said, "Thanks. You really saved me back there." Sal gave him a confused look. "Ordering for me," Russell explained further. "Since the order came from you, she won't feel bad about memorizing my order wrong all those months ago. Because it's you who ordered it."

"Pretty sure she's forgotten what your usual order is by now. But whatever makes you happy.