I Am A Monster

I Am A Monster : Chapter 22

Chapter 22

Another boy enters the room. He has light brown eyes, thick, wavy brown hair, tan skin, a mischievous smile, and playful eyes. When he sees me, though, his expression changes, as does mine. Kathy and Sam see this, and Kathy, with a full, wide smile, grabs Sam's arm, pulls him out of the room, and shuts the door.

I feel numb, even as the tingles are racking through my body, tickling my spine and making me want to arch my back. I shoot to my feet, and a low snarl escapes between my slightly raised, wrinkled lips.

Bree, Alexa pleads, it's fine. Stop!

But I don't. He steps closer, and I step back, crouching into a defensive position, my eyes darting between him and the door. He takes another step forward, this one more cautious and taken with great care, a baffled, hurt expression in his eyes.

I take another step back, crouching even lower, looking up at him through eyes narrowed to slits, my snarl becoming louder and more feral.

"Why are you doing this?" he whispers. His voice is low and pain-filled; it makes me want to cry.

Why do I want to cry for this stranger? That's all he is. A stranger.

Please! Alexa sobs. Bree, please! For me.

But I don't. I know it's my mate standing there in front of me with his hurt expression, and I will do everything in my power to get away with him.

"I don't want you," I snarl. "I never wanted you."

"You're ruining me! My mate!"

"My name is Bree. I am no mate of yours." My voice radiates power and anger. He backs up now, and I step forward, my snarl becoming more pronounced.

"Hi, Bree," he says nervously, taking another step backward (I take another step forward in response, my eyes still narrowed). "Name's Mark."

"Get out," I say, "Mark."

But he doesn't. Instead he takes another step forward. I can't help it but leap backwards, very close to snapping. I feel it coming, building inside of me.

"Get OUT!" I repeat in a screech.

He staggers backwards. I see tears slide down his face. The wolf part of me wants to run forward and hug him, but I resist the urge. Instead, my snarl becomes so loud it sounds like an old truck roaring to life.

I feel like I'm splitting apart.

Bree, you're soul mates! Alexa cries desperately. There's a reason for that!

I shake my head. Tears glisten in my eyes, and Mark steps forward, looking at a loss for words. His expression is so full of pain and loss, like I've just died. I hate drama, but this is just too much.

"I--" I finally let out a whimper that's close enough to a sob that he leaps forward, hugging me protectively, holding me tight. His strength is bewildering. He is bewildering. But I'm still stronger than him; two years in the forest have strengthened me, toughened me. I push him off with a well-aimed shove and back up against the wall, snarling fearsomely. My emotions feel like they're ready to spill out of me. The ones on the surface are pain, anger, bewilderment, and indecision.

"I need...time," I manage, my lips still lifted, "for a--decision."

He swallows and brushes away his tears. "Of all people, I get stuck with you," he says, his voice so full of hatred and rage that the tears that are in my eyes finally spill over, running down my face and dripping on the floor in little pools of salt water.

Then he leaves the room, the door slamming shut behind him.

Alexa is screaming at me, too, and I break down onto the floor, sobbing uncontrollably and wishing I could die.

* * *

Kathy bursts into the room. I look up; she sees my tearstained face. She waves her hand at Sam, silently willing for him to walk away, and runs up to me, hugging me.

"It's okay if he doesn't want you," she tells me. "We'll figure something out."

My head is buried in her chest, her chin on top of my head.

"It's not him," I say, "it's me."

She pulls back from me, shocked. It looks like she's trying to stop herself from shooting to her feet, screaming at me like Alexa did, and running out, abandoning me with no company but my tears pooling on the floor. But then she visibly relaxes; her tensed muscles relax and she looks at me with a slightly calmer expression.

"Why?" she whispers.

The tears come faster. My voice choked, I begin to get traumatized. "I--I rejec--I rejected--I rejected--I rejected him," I sob.

"Why?" she repeats. Her hand moves up and down my back in a calming gesture, but I want to flinch away from her touch.

"I don't--I don't--I don't want--want--I don't want a mate," I choke out, looking down and squeezing my eyes shut. She hugs me, one of my only friends that I met only a few minutes ago, already hugging me.

"You can't reject him," she says. "Bree, he's your soul mate."

But I just shake my head stubbornly, too upset to dry my tears on my shirt, too upset to even think that Kathy is seeing me crying. When sense comes back to me I'll be embarrassed, but I'm too emotionally overloaded to do more than nod, shake my head, and occasionally stutter a sentence or two.

"Fine," she says, "I'll talk to him."

I grab her shirt, but I know I'm weak from such strong emotions and distractions. She easily slides out of my weak grip, and then she disappears out of the doorway.