I'm Not Okay 2

Smile for me

I slowly opened my eyes and I was in a white room, Extremely white room actually. I sighed knowing where I was.

"Fuck, I hate hospitals" I muttered

"Watch you language!" I heard a women say, a very familiar women yet I do not recognise her voice. "It's me Cassie" Who's me? Who.Is.Me?

"Show yourself" I said shakily and the door opened to reveal...My mother? She didn't look ghostly, she looked like her. "Mum..." I whispered "I'm dreaming"

"Well, no, you have joined me" She smiled and I sat up. She sat on the bed and hugged me tight. I hugged her back smiling a little.

"What do you mean?" I chuckled

"You're...Dead" She whispered faintly and I quickly pulled away "That's why you saw me" She put her hand on mine and I shook my head.

"But...Gerard"

"His holding you right at this moment, Mourning you...Hoping for you to go back" She whispered sadly and I looked down.

"I don't want to leave him, I don't want to leave them! I wanna go back" I frowned and she shook her head. "I'm sorry mum but I have to" I said jumping up and running through the door. I had to go back to Gerard, I just had to. I kept running through the corridor, my mother running after me. "I have to.."I whispered running to the end where a door was.

"Cassie!" She shouted and  I opened it closing my eyes and walking through.

"C-Cassie...Please wake up" I opened my eyes to see my body lying on the floor, Gerard holding it crying. "Please" He pleaded. I looked to the side to see Luke standing there...He looked like he was in shock.

"NO!" He screamed running over and falling to his knee's. Frank was on the phone panicking, probably talking to an ambulance. "Please... I love you Cassie" A tear fell from his face and hit my lip. I felt a hand on my shoulder and soon my mother walked to my side.

"Cassie, you have the choice. You either walk to your body and lay in the position you're in now or join me. Be happy" She whispered staring at my limp body.

"Don't you want me to be happy?" I asked her confused "Don't you see they make me happy? Don't you want me to be alive?" I questioned her and she sighed.

"I Envy their abilities to make you happy. Iv'e been watching over you everyday and I see the pain you've been through. When your father dies...I'll have strict words" She frowned and I chuckled. "It's up to you" She whispered sadly. 

"I may have had a shit life...But it gets better, always does. I love you mum, I really do with all my heart but I love them boys to. Gerard treats me as one of his own. Luke makes me feel like I'm on top of the world and did I even mention Bandit? She's freaking adorable! I love them mum and I'm sorry but we shouldn't meet again. Not yet" I whispered and she nodded letting a tear slide down her cheek, but yet she still smiled.

"I'm so proud of you" She whispered nudging me forward gently "Make them happy" She smiled kissing my cheek and stepping back. I slowly walked back to my limp body and sat where my hips were. I laid down into Gerard's arms and pain shot through my body. My mother disappeared and I felt alive.

"Smile for me" I choked out smiling at Gerard, his eyes widened in disbelief and he held me tight in a hug.

"C..Cassie" He whispered kissing my forehead "Stay with us!" He smiled and a tear fell down my cheek. I heard an ambulance siren come closer and closer until I saw the lights myself. Luke smiled at me holding my hand and I smiled back. Today I nearly died, but you know...It made my decisions clear. I'm going to spend the rest of my life happy, with these guys. I'm going to live a healthy life...Marry Luke and have mini Bandit's! My mother will be watching over me, Gerard will always be there for me. Even though my life has been strange, It's been a roller coaster ride but...It was God damn worth it.