Save me // ziall ✓

| Chapter Five |

~Niall's POV~

I couldn't shake that feeling for some reason, and I had been "home" for a week. I really didn't know what home was anymore, it's a place where you're loved, and wanted right? I feel like I really didn't fit in anymore with the boys, since I pulled that stunt, and ran away for an month. The boys seemed to be careful with me, like I was a new born baby or I was made of glass, and I was done with it.

I was in the kitchen, reaching for something that was a little to tall for me. Harry appeared next to me, and tried to help me. I smacked him arm away, "I can do this Styles," I growled, and he backed away slowly. I almost got the bowl I was reaching for, before it all fell from the cabinet, and I nearly smashed my head into table. I huffed, and bent over, quickly snatching everything up, putting it away before closing the cabinet, grabbing my keys and walking out the front door, pissed.

I'm not sure what got me so worked up, but now I sat on the beach, a faint breeze blowing, eating my fast food, which is no good for me anyways. I felt out of place, I'm not sure why. But I am sure they have caught on to my self harm. I haven't been doing it as much anymore, and I've been talking to someone. The boys don't know about it, but it's where I disappear for a good hour or two at a time. I sit and talk to a very nice lady, and she has helped me through a bunch. I'm super happy to have been sent to her.

I had been eating more, less self harm and I still don't fit in. I sighed softly, watching the waves crash on the shore, when I heard foot steps behind me. I had no idea who it was, until he sat next to me. My eyes darted over to him, then quickly away. He smelt strongly like smoke, with a little Axe aftershave. He slung an arm around my shoulders, and pulled me into his chest.

"I'm sorry for how the boys are treating you...they are just worried, S'all,"

"But they treat me like I'm glass or something, it's annoying." I reply.

"But Ni, you also disappeared for a month, and everyday for an hour or two everyday. You're just not yourself anymore..." He whispers softly, and I lean closer to him.

"I've hit a small bump in the road, and I got knocked off. I'll be the same someday, just not today." I explain, and he sighs.

"I'm sorry Ni."

"What are you sorry for Zee?" I ask.

"For not being there for you, for not trying harder, for not finding out, for you being broken..."

"Zayn Jawaad Malik, none of that is your fault, and stop blaming yourself for it." I say, trying to sound stern.

He's silent for a while, but I feel his hold on me tightening, and I cuddle closer to him, needing him, and everything about him. He found me broken, and slowly started mending me, but dropped me again, only to pick me back up and fix him. He's like a little kid, they cry when they break something, but slowly start to fix it again. Then it breaks, and they know how to fix it. I sigh softly, and take in a deep breath, only smelling him. He chuckles softly, and I feel it vibrating through his chest, filling the chilly beachy air.

"We should be getting back home, it's starting to get cold, and dark. C'mon I'll drive you." He says slowly, my heart melting a little more.

We where wrapped up in my bed, I had my head on his chest, listening to his heart beat, thump thump thump, like a beat to a drum.  I smile softly, and his hold around me tightens.

"Sing to me before I fall asleep?" I ask with a wide yawn.

"Somewhere in between
The beginning and the end
September took the tourist
And settled in for good

You could hear the trains again
Brooklyn girls in scarves
Summer left and no one said a word

We'd open your window
Stay in your bed
All day 'til the street lights came on

So what happened to bulletproof weeks in your arms
What happened to feeling cheap radio songs
What happened to thinking the world was flat
What happened to that

Up on 59th street
Right before the rain
Lovers catching taxis going downtown

I'm talking to what's left of you
Watching what I say
Counting all the freckles on your perfect face

You open your window
And I stay on your bed
Just hoping that right words will come

So what happened to bullet proof weeks in your arms
What happened to feeling cheap radio songs
What happened to thinking the world was flat
What happened to that

So what happened to bullet proof weeks in your arms
What happened to feeling cheap radio songs
What happened to thinking the world was flat
What happened to that
(what happened to that)

Its all gone
Love, it's all wrong

So what happened to bullet proof weeks in your arms
What happened to feeling cheap radio songs
What happened to thinking the world was flat
What happened, what happened to that?"

All I heard was his beautiful song filled words, before I was shipped off to dreamland, hoping for only good ones.

A/N; The song Zayn sings is Bulletproof weeks by Matt Nathasnson