Chapter 10

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When I wake up, I'm in the couch. When I open my eyes, I feel the first signs of the hangover. My head is hurting so much and I still can feel the scent of alcohol in my breath.

I mentally pray that no one is here. I realize I'm in the couch, so I get up and sit down. I rub my eyes with my hands and look at my reflection in the mirror in the wall.

Holy fucking shit. I am a fucking mess.

My hair is completely messy, I have dark circles under my bloodshot eyes and hell, I stink.

I check my phone to see what time it is. Holy shit. It's 11:42 in the morning. I sigh and decide to take a shower.

To be quite honest, I can't remember anything that happened after I finished the first bottle of vodka. My thoughts are jumbled up, but I manage to remember that mom, dad, Aiden and Angela probably slept at the hotel, since the wedding takes two days.

Kind of different, I know, but Bella wanted to follow a Slavic tradition or something like that.

I go to my room, strip my clothes off and step in the shower. I feel the cold water cascading down my back and I feel somewhat more tense than I was before.

I get out, put some clothes on and sit in my bed. My knuckles are still purple, but it's okay, they will heal. But I don't think this burning in my chest ever will.

The scenes of her lips pressed against his are attacking my mind over and over and over again and I know they won't leave that early. I check my phone once more and frown since I see in my notifications that I have sixteen missed calls.

I try to see who called me. It's S.

My head starts hurting more than seconds before and my breathing gets accelerated. What the fuck?

Why did she call me so many times? Didn't she spent the whole night with that little prick?

I click in my latest texts and see that she has send me countless texts also. I slide up and my heart starts racing when I see that I texted her before she texted me.

Fuck.

Fuck.

Holy shit.

I look closer at the screen and read what I sent her.

Sent at 3:36 am.

S, why did you to this to me?

3:38.

S?

3:42.

Fuck, what have you done to me? My head is spinning and the only thing I can fucking slur is your name.

3:46.

I'm sorry for have been an asshole. And u know what? You deserve him. He's not like me. He must be nice and he must give you everything you ever wanted. I'm sorry I couldn't be that person.

3:59.

Fuck, this is my third bottle now.

4:03.

Shit, Stephanie. I love you. I love you so fucking much it hurts.

4:04.

I'm way too late.

Suddenly, it seems as if the air has seeped out of my lungs and my mind needs to be rebooted. My body is motionless and I don't have the courage to move not even one nerve.

I close my eyes in pure rage of myself and shit, this anger is taking over my entire body. When I open my eyes, my knuckles are bleeding, but I can't feel any pain.

Some of my blood is in the wall, but now, that's the least of my worries. I sit down in bed and bite my lip so hard that it starts bleeding a little.

Fuck. It isn't supposed to hurt so much. I'm not sixteen anymore. I should be able to control my emotions.

I lock my phone because I'm too much of a coward to look at those texts. It starts buzzing and I see it's her.

The last thing I want right now is to pick it up, but I do anyways. I don't say anything, but she starts asking for me to say something.

"Tyler," she is saying, her voice is breaking a little. "Please answer me." She begs.

"Please. I am so sorry for haven't responded your texts earlier. I was at the wedding," She tells me. "Please, please answer me." She begs one more time.

I could never say no to her, so I murmur a simple hey.

She sighs in relief and stays in silence for a minute. "I was so worried about you," She whispers. "Never scare me like that anymore," She tells me.

"I'm sorry," my voice betrays me by breaking down.

"D-Did you mean what you... What you texted me?" she murmurs, with a hint of despair in her voice.

I stay silent for a while. "You know the answer," I mumble.

She breathes out and asks me to meet her in the park. I tell her I'll go there and hung up. I try to put some bandaids in my hands so she doesn't see my wounds.

I walk to the park and when I look around, I notice she already there sitting in the bench.

I take a deep breath and walk up to her. When she sees me, she runs up to me and the first thing she does is to hug me tight.

"Don't you dare scare me like that again," she tells me and hugs me even more.

She's shorter than me, so I rest my chin in her head and hug her with the same strength.

She lets me go and I sense that she is on the verge of tears, but she doesn't cry.

"I spent the night worried sick about you," She says and I can see from the dark circles under her eyes that she's telling the truth.

I don't say anything and she just rests her head in my shoulder and let out a deep breath. I know she's tired and I also know that I'm the reason for her restlessness and I feel so unworthy of this moment because I'm an imbecile and she is everything I will ever want, but along with that, I fear that she's everything I will never attain.

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Hello, pretty people. Sorry for the late update and new updates will be soon. :) love you guys and you guys rock. ❤️ I'm happy but I don't know why I am, no one would be in my current situation. But it's ok, i don't even know why I'm saying this.

Sorry for the boooring chapters.

Don't send nudes. Send love, good vibes and food.

Love,

Jas, xx.

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