Guardian (Niall Horan + Harry Styles)

chapter 16

*contains slight sexual content--if you don't like it, don't read it and don't report it please* 

*Niall's POV*

i sigh, still procrastinating on telling Jo about my cancer diagnosis. i can't hide it from her forever, but i really won't be able to bear to see her upset again...

it hurts just to think of her ever crying. 

ever. 

"hey, Niall, how are you doing today?" the doctor breezes through the door and greets me, once again, with the same, perfect, bleached-white smile. 

"better..a lot better. i mean, my lungs still..well you know," i chuckle. i think i'm doing pretty good for someone in my condition. 

i hate the sound of that.

"that's good. well, buddy, good news, you get to go back home. you will still have to come in frequently for treatment; i gave your mom a schedule. it'll be in this same room, so get used to it," he winks. 

"thanks doc," i reply. I'm still soar to the thought of having to come in for treatment, but i'll be civil.

"no problem. you're very lucky, bud," he smiles again, and motions toward the door. "your mom is here, so whenever you're ready," he offers. 

"alright, just give me one second..." 

he nods and exits the small room. i sit up and check my phone for the first time in days, or at least what it feels like. 2 missed calls, 14 text messages..

i'll respond later.

i grab my backpack, ear buds, and football and head out the door, to see my mum standing in the lobby. she smiles when she sees me, and i return the smile and walk toward her. once i get to her i embrace her in a large, warm Horan hug, and i can feel her crying into my shoulder. 

"mum..." i half-laugh, half-show concern.

"ah, i'm sorry babe," she pulls away and smiles, drying her tears. i can't tell if they were tears of joy or sadness--probably both. "i'm so glad and sad at the same time and..oh well whatever. let's go home," her smile grows. 

"that sounds better than you can imagine," i laugh and follow her out to my car.

~~~

i get back to school, wandering in the empty hallway, not really wanting to go to class. i'm really just waiting for Jo, she should be out of class any second. i need her, i need to feel her arms around me, i need to know she's right here..

i want her more than i ever thought i would. 

i hate thinking like this...she's innocent, she's sweet..but that still doesn't change my feelings. i need her.

i can't change what i've done in my awful past...but this is different. i'm not using Jo for anything. i can't believe that was me who did those terrible things, and i will never forgive myself...but Jo is my saving grace. she has changed my darkness into light, she made my perspective brighter and she helped me in more ways than she will ever know. just by being herself, she saved me. and i need her.

i love her.

i hear the bell sound through the empty hallway and soon it's flooded with teenagers, pushing past me to get to their next class. i spot my girl across the hall, just as her eyes meet mine. an instant grin of relief washes over her face as she pushes through the other people to get to me.

"oh my God, you're back!" she exclaims, her face lit up like a Christmas tree. my heart soars as i realize that i'm the reason for that. i smile down at her, with more emotion than she could ever know. Damn it, i love her so much. somehow she's managed to wedge her way into my every thought...and i would'nt have it any other way.