D. Gray Man—Chapter Nine
After an hour, my tears were dry. Even though I could still feel the overwhelming pain and the feeling of being lost, I didn’t have any tears to shed anymore. Everything seemed hopeless. My bed seemed too hard. My room seemed dark and depressed. I just wanted to throw my pillow and cry. But I’m already out of tears. So I picked up my pillow and chucked it at the dispirited wall.
I didn’t bother turning on the light. I sat there in my gloomy room for what seemed like forever. Not moving, just sitting there thinking how screwed up my life is. So I came to be an exorcist, but now they’re telling me I have a phobia of akuma. How am I going to be an exorcist like that?! A humourless smile appeared on my dishevelled face. This is hilarious. I let out a high pitched laugh. It didn’t sound like me and it didn’t matter. Nothing mattered right now. All I ever wanted was a loving family.
What do I get?
An even more messed up life.
Is Koumi going to let me go home? Unless I get over my fear, I can’t fight akumas, I’m just going to get myself killed.
Wait, what if they don’t let me go home? I want to stay with Allen nii-san but this is just too much. I’ve been here for what, 5 days? And this is what I get.
I started laughing again. A stray tear fell down my face. Guess I was wrong, there are more tears. I kept on laughing and giggling until I fell into dreamless sleep.
When I woke up the disgusted feeling evaporated slightly. I changed into my uniform and stared down at my shorts. Slowly, I pulled on my tights and slipped into my black shoes. I didn’t want to face anyone right now. I wanted to die.
That was slightly exaggerated. But right now, I pretty much wanted to die. I’m weak. I’ll admit that, I didn’t want to face reality when it gets rough. I needed my pillar of support. And that was Allen nii-san. I needed to find Allen nii-san.
I washed my face quickly to get rid of the redness around my aqua eyes. I practiced a steady smile and a normal laugh.
My first instinct was to ask Koumi since he would know if Allen nii-san was back from the mission yet. Then I realized that I probably wouldn’t be able to face him after what he told me. I knew that he would be back to his usual cheerfulness...but I knew the tears would come again.
Letting out a exasperated sigh, I headed out to find Lenalee. She’ll probably have a vague idea if Allen nii-san was back.
Finding her was easy; she was in the research lab handing out coffee to everyone.
“Lenalee!”
She turned her head in my direction, “Akira-chan, I’ll be right there.”
“Okay.”
She strolled over after giving the coffee to Johnny.
“Is Allen nii-san back?” I blurted before she said anything.
She smiled, “Yeah, he came back about half an hour ago. Nii-san called him to his office.”
“For another mission?” He just got back.
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D. Gray Man~Secrets of The Order
FanfictionI'm Akira Walker, yes, I'm related to Allen Walker, not by blood though. He found me on the streets. I'm about to join the Black Order. Allen nii-san joined a year ago. I miss him. Since the time he found me on the streets, he's been leaving and th...
