EMILY

02: Kickstart My Heart

Track 02: Kickstart My Heart

"Hey." Their lead guitarist pointed at me. "Let's go." He's smiling so wide while offering his hand. Wait, whaaaaaaaaaaaat?!

I couldn't move. The people around me started to get wild. Oh. My. Holy. Pancakes. My friends pushed me and heard them saying 'go.'

Somebody held my wrist, grabbed my waist and carried me up to the railings. Was it the bouncer? I don't know. Hindi mag-function ang utak ko.

I suddenly saw myself standing right on the stage, in front of the crazy crowd with my knees shaking.

Ano na 'to? Ano na 'to? Ano na 'to? I kept shouting inside my head. Hindi ko alam kung ba't yun ang itinatanong ko sa isip ko but those were the only words I could think of right at this moment.

I couldn't calm myself. I looked at them, sa mga taong nasa stage. They're all smiling at me. Sa audience who are cheering at the top of their lungs. My eyes started to get blurry. Shizwiz! Wag kang maiiyak sa stage Eimee. Parang awa mo na.

Kalma. Okay. Breathe in. Breathe out. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath and slowly opened my eyes.

Sina Chi at Bien ang agad kong hinanap sa audience. Siomai! Hindi ko sila makita.

Pakiramdam ko lalabas ang puso ko sa sobrang bilis ng tibok nito. Nahihirapan akong huminga, ang bigat sa dibdib. Wala rin akong masyadong marinig, it's like I'm only hearing echos. Parang nabibingi ako.

Bakit parang hindi na nagpa-function ng maayos yung senses at body systems ko?

Biglang nag-dim ang ilaw sa stage. At may isang ilaw na nanggagaling sa control booth. Nasa akin ang spotlight. Literal. Mas lalo tuloy akong kinabahan.

"Hi, may I have your name?" Hindi ko napansin na nakalapit na pala sa akin ang vocalist nila na napag-alaman kong Mikkos ang pangalan. He flashed this makalaglag-nguso este-pangang ngiti. I could not speak. I want to answer but I couldn't find my voice.

Nakatingin lang ako sa mga mata niyang parang nilulunod ako sa kawalan. Hindi pa naman ako marunong lumangoy.

I've only just realized now that he's really good looking. I mean yes, natitigan ko na rin siya kahapon doon sa Threads pero iba yung dating ngayon eh. Siguro kasi nakangiti siya ngayon unlike kahapon.

Tapos sobrang lapit pa niya, inches away lang. Yung singkit niyang mga mata, na pag ngumiti hindi mo na makita. Ang mapuputi at pantay-pantay niyang ngipin na parang pang-model ng toothpaste. Yung matangos niyang ilong at higit sa lahat ang napakinis niyang face na parang walang pores!

At ang bango niya. Sa sobrang lapit niya naaamoy ko na siya. Kahit pawis na pawis na mabango pa rin. Hindi ko na kinakaya ito. Magkaka-mini heart attack yata ako.

"Hmmm?" I came back to my senses. He's waiting for my reply. I breathed deeply before I spoke with a small voice.

"E-Eimee." I could here my voice shaking and I felt like there's a lump in my throat. Parang pumiyok pa yata ako kasi nagsitawanan yung audience. Oh no! This is embarassing.

"Cute name." Their lead guitarist commented. Ang taong responsable kung bakit ako nandito sa stage ngayon. At ngayon ko lang na realize na siya si kuyang how-much-is-this! He's standing on my left side. I think he's name is Ran as I heard somebody from the crowd shouted his name.

Hindi ko alam kung matatawa ako o ano. Small world it is. It's like fate is playing pranks on me! Akalain mong magkabanda silang dalawa?

They asked few more questions pero puro tango, iling at one-liner na lang ang sagot ko. Gusto ko nang bumaba ng stage, nakakahiya na. Pinagpapawisan ako ng malamig at panay punas ako ng pawis sa noo ko.