Sisters Three (Completed)

19. Brenna (3/4)

"It's been so long since we've really been sisters," she whispered.

Morna turned to face Brenna. "What are you talking about? We're always sisters."

"Not the way we were before. We used to do everything together. The servants couldn't separate us. They had to let you join my lessons when you kept distracting me through the windows," Brenna said.

Morna smiled softly. "I remember that. I wanted to play hide and seek, and Adair was off with her little friend somewhere."

Brenna tilted her head, her fingers absently tracing the patterns of her duvet. "I wonder what Adair is doing now," she said. "I hope she's found some happiness. Lord knows she never knew it when we were still a family."

"I think she was happy sometimes," Morna said. "She just missed her mother. I think Papa wanted to forget that she ever existed in order to escape his sorrow."

Brenna nodded. "Maybe I can find her and invite her to the wedding."

"That would be nice."

They were silent for a few minutes, each in their own thoughts. Brenna's ran on the mysteries of married life that she was about to discover. She wondered what Robbin would be like when she was forced to spend entire days with him. Her experience with married couples was extremely limited. She tried to think back to Mama and Papa. They had been so content with each other, cozy and comfortable like a pair of gloves that always belonged to each other. But Brenna also remembered the cold day every year when the anniversary of his first wife's death came around, and they were all forced to wear black and not have any fun or make any noise. Mama had always looked so sad on that day, and Brenna knew it wasn't for any sort of sympathy for Papa's first wife. It was because she saw that Papa's heart had not always belonged to her, and that he was still touched by a piece of another woman's life.

Brenna rolled over, shivering at the thought. She wasn't sure she ever wanted to give her heart to someone when the potential for such aching longing was possible. Love wasn't something she wanted.

Morna shifted, sitting up on one elbow. Brenna felt her looking over her shoulder, but didn't turn around. Morna didn't say anything for a few moments, and when she finally spoke it was barely over a whisper.

"Brenna, I'm afraid of moving to Anjeluund."

"That's silly. I know this has been home for practically our whole life, but we have to move sometime. Anjeluund is cultured and powerful and the center of the trading universe," Brenna said. "There's going to be so many new experiences. You should be excited, not scared."

"It's not that," Morna said, resting her chin on Brenna's arm. "Well, not entirely. It's more... I was wondering what will happen if there's no water around the palace? And we'll have to take a boat for part of the journey there—"

Brenna groaned and sat up sharply, forcing Morna backward. "Not this, Morna!"

The nostalgic bond shattered as a wave of annoyance rushed over Brenna. It was so strong that it startled her a bit, but it overpowered any other emotion she might have entertained. All she could think was that Morna was going to bring up that old obsession that had caused so much trouble. Visions of the aunts worrying about how to keep Morna's secret safe and ignoring the preparations that needed to be done for Brenna's departure flooded into her mind. Her sister would take all the attention, once again, and Brenna would be relegated to the background.

"But what if I can't control it on the ship! Shouldn't we tell Robbin so that he can help-"

Brenna laughed sharply. First Afton and now Robbin. It was a wonder Morna didn't just take everything that Brenna fought for. "We're not telling Robbin anything, because there's something I don't think you've really realized, Morna. This stupid little illness you have is a nuisance. I don't know why your brain is so scrambled that you want to kill yourself when you see water, but I can tell you that it's a burden to those that know. Do you know how worried I've been over the years? Always on guard, always making sure that there's no water too close, but enough water at a certain distance so that you don't get sick. It's exhausting. I'm not going to unload that on Robbin when he already has a bloody war on his plate."

"I'm sorry," Morna said, but Brenna didn't want to hear the rest. It would be sincere and tearful, and Brenna knew she'd just been horrible about something that Morna had no control over. But, right now, in this moment, she didn't want to apologize to her sister. She didn't want to be in the wrong.

"Just drop it," Brenna said, walking to her wardrobe and stuffing any article of clothing she could reach into its drawers. Morna sat silently on the bed and Brenna could feel her eyes on her back. She tried to ignore it, but her skin crawled. She'd have to apologize later, when she felt bad about snapping. Right now she felt almost happy that she'd finally let Morna know that not everyone was devoted to her and her illness.

"All right," Morna murmured. "I'll drop it."

Brenna jammed a glove into an already filled drawer and heard the rip of fabric. She cursed and yanked the glove back out, examined the large rent down one side, and angrily tossed it back to the floor. She wasn't even supposed to be putting the clothing away. It was all supposed to be going into cases for the move, and here she was ruining them by jamming them back where she'd just pulled them from.

Turning, Brenna opened her mouth to tell Morna that she was going to go check on the maid, when she spotted Robbin standing just outside her door. His hand was raised, poised to knock, but when he saw he'd been noticed, he dropped it and stepped inside. Brenna crossed her arms automatically, and Morna ducked her head.