A little girl said goodbye at the orphanage that afternoon. She was no more than 7 years old. Often-times Eugene would see the tops of her black hair jutting out from the back of the group of kids when he reads. Sometimes in the playground she'd notice the little girl sinking deeper inside the arms of an old, ragged doll. The yellow straw of the doll's arms would stick out like the tufts of hair at the top of her head.
Today she said 'goodbye' to the orphanage. Goodbye to the creaking walls that kept her warm during the winter storms. Goodbye to the women who would spank her when she's loud, and hug her when she's crying. Goodbye to the chapel, and the wooden board she'd kneel on every Sunday.
And lastly, she said goodbye to her friends. But for the one who would sleep beside her during winter storms, the one who'd hug her when she's crying for being loud, and the one who she'd kneel beside on Sunday mornings, she gave a special sort of goodbye. She gave a kiss on the cheek as thank you. And the raggedy doll as a gift so maybe one day they can see each other again.
It seemed more a promise than a wish.
Some of the women were starting to weep, and they dampened their handkerchiefs with their backs turned. Even Eugene's tear ducts were giving way though for a more selfish reason.
As he watched the little girl walk hand-in-hand with her new parents, he started to feel a new type.of feeling. Or maybe it wasn't new. Maybe it had been residing somewhere inside him, dormant, sleeping. Waiting. And when he saw the face of her new parents, oh their faces so warm, so inviting, it was like lightning had struck and the little feeling that laid, woke up and filled him until he was heavy.
Eugene felt desperately homesick. A strange sort of feeling to have when he'd been living under the same roof since he first opened his eyes.
He recalled how the couple briskly looked over him when they first came, as if he wasn't even a second choice.
Maybe Rolf is right... maybe I am getting too old.
He glanced towards Rolf who was sitting on the staircase, nibbling at the remains of a sticky candy from its wrapper. Sticky candy was not an easy product to come by, especially if you live under the strict rules of the orphanage. Was Rolf really so self-sustaining that he'd have not one, but two sticky candies stashed inside his pockets?
Maybe Rolf is the sort of boy who doesn't need parents to get him a big house, maybe he can do it on his own.
As each day passes by, his offer was beginning to look more attractive...
No! He cant, its too dangerous.
Stick to your books and your spot on the porch Eugene. Stick to it and you'll be safe. Sooner or later, someone will come find you, pick you up and take you to a big castle far, far away...
The little boy squeezed his eyes shut and clung to those words. He held them between the balls of his fists like a prayer, and watched the little girl waving goodbye to him, the black tufts of her hair barely jutting out behind the broad back of her new parents.
