Hold Me Now (Ziall Fan Fiction) ✔

Hold Me Now-Thirteen

Note: Self harm!

Chapter Thirteen

As soon as Niall had the door locked, he broke down. He fell to his knees, sobs wracking his small body, the tears blinding his vision. "Niall? Niall? Will you please open the door?" Zayn called, knocking on the door. Niall gasped in air, his bum planted firmly on the cold tile floor.

His fingers flew to his mouth, brushing over his lips, Zayn's presence still lingering. Oh, how good it felt when Zayn kissed him, when Zayn touched him lovingly, when Zayn said sweet things to him. But all Zayn really wanted was his body, to pleasure himself. And Niall couldn't give him that, couldn't give him anything other than a broken heart.

"Niall, angel, open the door!" Zayn said frantically, banging on the door. Niall stood up, not bothering to brush away the hot tears that streaked his cheeks. He looked at the counter, to Zayn's bathroom bag. He hesitated, but reached out, clicking the latches on the front and opening it. He rummaged through it until he found what he was looking for, Zayn's razor. "Open the door!"

"No!" Niall shouted, choking on tears. "No," he said, softly. "No one wants me. I'm useless, ugly, no one loves me. No one would care if I were gone. If I were dead." But he said that to himself, so Zayn couldn't hear him. The razor shook in his hand, as he hasn't cut himself for years. Where would he cut? His wrists? No, too easily spotted. His arms? No, they weren't always covered. His legs? No, they would be seen.

"Niall, please! I'm sorry, okay? Please, open the door before you do something you'll regret!" Zayn pleaded. Had he heard Niall? Did he knew he was going to cut? Niall ignored Zayn's begging, pushing down his jeans, as he was shirtless. When his jeans were to his ankles, he yanked down his boxers, biting his lip.

The razor trembled as Niall brought it to his hip, the blades resting on the soft flesh there. He pressed down, yanking his hand back, the razor cutting cleanly across his skin. He whimpered quietly, watching the blood slip down his pale legs. Just one more swipe and he would stop. The door was bending slightly against Zayn's pressure, so Niall knew he had to be quick.

"Niall! Stop! Please, don't do it!" Zayn cried, pressing against the door. He couldn't let his angel hurt himself, he couldn't. Niall brought the razor to his right hip, swiping across. He had only planned on cutting twice, but the crimson red blood sent a rush through him, and he wanted to see more.

"This is your fault!" Niall shouted, tears filling his eyes. "You made me!" The razor skimmed across Niall's hips again, making him hold in a cry. His legs were trembling, and he was getting dizzy. But he forced the blades to cut his skin again, slowly, drawing out the pain. He wanted Zayn to know how much it hurt, so he let out a small scream, his body shaking.

Zayn had stopped pounding and screaming on the door, and the silence stabbed Niall hard. I knew he didn't care about me, Niall thought bitterly, it was all just an act. I'm sorry Louis, you'll have to face this. And with that in mind, he slashed merciless at his hips, crying out. The light was fading, his legs struggling to keep his body up. The door was thrown open, and Zayn burst into the room, catching Niall as he fell.

"Your fault," Niall whispered before everything went black.

~~

"This is your fault! You made me!" Niall screamed. Zayn's body froze, and he stopped banging against the door. A key, surely there was a key somewhere. He found it, hanging on a nail in the corner of the room. He snatched it as he heard Niall crying out. No, not his angel.

The key fit smoothly into the lock, and Zayn twisted it, throwing open the door. Niall was slashing at his hips, naked. Zayn dashed to his side as he fell, his shaking legs no longer able to support his body.