"Thrift Shop" by BartBaKer

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Macklemore: I got a nasty rash probably from wearing this gross used jacket. Front pocket just found a used condom guess I should've washed it. Walk into the club like wait what I think that I'm lost. I'm messed up and smell like piss from the thrift shop. Wipe the dandruff with so much swagger the people like

Old Dude: Damn that's a gross ass cracker.

Macklemore: Wearing these used panties.

Girl #1: Hope you don't get a disease.

Macklemore: Who gives a shit got them with these shoes super cheap.

Girl #2: Those really stink.

Macklemore: Said a girl sitting next to me.

Girl #2: You look like your homeless and what is that on your jeans?

Macklemore: Jizzzzzzzzzzzz but hey pretty sure it's AIDS free. They had a bloody sweater I bought a bloody sweater since I've been wearing it my stomache's starting to hurt. Hello hello my skins turning yellow

Thrift Shop Store Clerk: Of that's the hepatitis it comes with all of the clothes.

Macklemore: Now I'm feeling real sick gonna puk on my toes the sneaker heads will be like

Sneaker Head: Ah! Not on the Velcros

Fat Lady: I don't know where I am does someone know how to get to McDonald's? I got lost now I'm in a thrift shop. This is fucking awful.

Macklemore: I can help you with that I just found a Big Mac in my back pocket. Oh needle I also found a needle.

Fat Lady: This taste fucking awful.

Macklemore: What you know about having a really bad hairdo? What you know getting graps from a hat dude I'm digging I'm searching right through this dumpster. This dead cat would go perfect with my shirt. Thank your grandad for donating his old dirty dentures even though my mouth really hurts.

Asian Dude: Are you ok man I think you should see a doctor.

Macklemore: Na I'm fine I don't need no god damn doctor. My hands are turning black I can't feel my nut sack Got diarrhea and a clap oh man it stings like a motherfucker. I think the bugs are biting in this motherfucker

Saxaphone Guy: Ok honestly dude stop saying motherfucker.

Macklemore: I just lost a the feeling in my legs now. I can't walk so I'm crawling on the damn ground. Stop playing saxophone and help me get up so I can go back to the club and show off my clothes.

Saxophone Guy: Dude, you're bleeding from your nose, your mouth is full of foam.

Macklemore: I don't care man let's go.

Black Guy: Maklemore looks like ass I think he needs a thrift shop intervention. He is green and he is seizuring. We need to talk to him. We think you need rehab, this is getting real bad, stop buying diseased clothes from the thrift shop down the road.

Macklemore: But they're incredible and they're blah-blah-blah

Saxophone Guy: He needs a hospital.

Black Guy: Let's take him it's down the road.

Macklemore: Where'd my arms and legs go?

Doctor: We cut off all your limbs they were infected from the gross clothes you bought. You almost died your lucky to be alive.

Real Macklemore: Now where's the nearest thrift shop?

Macklemore: You know, there's actually one right down the road.

Real Macklemore: Gee thanks man. Hella dope parody by the way.

Doctor: Dude, was that Maklemore?

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