Taylor Swift: Once upon a time. Before I was insane I dated this Disney guy, Joe Jonas was his name. But he broke up with me.
Joe Jonas: You're just way too creepy. Plus I found someone else his name's Mickey
Taylor: So I wrote a song about his stupid ass. Then found this guy named John, but that was over fast. If you don't marry me, I will pull out your teeth.
John Mayer: You're totally crazy.
Taylor: Maybe. He hit me with his guitar, and he said that
John: We are through.
Taylor: Just you wait until I write a song about you. Then I met that Jake Gyllenhaal dick, and was obsessed right away.
Jake Gyllenhaaal: You've sent me one thousand messages, and that's just from today.
Taylor: Oh that's because I'm having your baby.
Jake: What? But you don't even put out.
Taylor: Stop questioning me Jakey or I'll put you six feet underground.
Jake: Woah! Woah! Psyco psyco psyco.
Taylor: Fine go! It's good material. Next came Kennedy. I think he was fifteen. I bought the house next door to watch you constantly, and also to make sure you never ever cheat
Connor Kennedy: OMG we are done you are scary.
Taylor: Harry was my last. That One Direction freak. I taped him to my wall, so he could never leave
Harry Styles: Someone call the police! You're insane we are through!
Taylor: You're just like the rest what did I do to you? So I used my stalker app, to track down all of those pricks. The next song I write I'll use their blood as my ink.
Jake: Holy crap that nut job just bursted in.
Taylor: What the hell is this?
Joe John Jake Kennedy and Harry: It's a support group for all the men, you wrote songs about you bitch.
Taylor: What? I have not written about Harry yet.
Harry: I am just planning ahead.
John: Why are you even here anyway?
Taylor: To finish you all off with my pen.
Taylor's Ex's: No! No! Devil! Devil! Devil
Taylor: Ow! Ow! It's true I'm the devil.
Doctor: Ok that's enough. You were right she's nuts. You are coming with us.
Taylor: Wait what? Get off of me. I'm not crazy.
Taylor's Ex's: It worked! This was all a trick we knew you would come so we hired this doctor.
Doctor: You're going to an insane asylum based on the behavior I observed.
Taylor: Ah! Ah! Let me go you assholes.
Doctors: No! No! Welcome to your new home.
Mickey: Ho Ho! So you're crazy too huh?