Beyond All Doubt (In watty awards 2011!)

I have never been good with death.

A searing aching pain is the first thing I feel, wetness is the second. I feel it trickle down my spine as I slowly make my body sit up right. My head swoons as I do so, and I can’t help but use my hand to balance my head; as i feel it will fall off. Hot white pain is in my palm, I try to look but all I see is black; am I blind? My eyes are open … I’m sure of it, I think to myself.

The sound of fire crackling and silent screams of agony, is all I can hear; the loud shouts have gone. I sit there not knowing what to do, worrying and not knowing what has happened. I finally after some time of reassurance, I gather myself up and try to stumble over uneven flooring, I fall a couple of times and the pain gets worse, though through all of that time, I tell myself I need to get out of here. 

I stumble most of the way until I find light, and when I do I feel warmth spread through me; I wasn’t blind. I look down at the damage of myself and my stomach line tightens. My palms were burnt to smithereens. What happened? I look around myself, the house was not a house anymore, and it was rubble. Bombs; is the first thing that enters my mind, but why would they drop them? I knew everyone hated Thomas but why choose now to strike against him?

“MUM …. DAD!” I look towards the noise; it was Daniel I could tell. I begin to run to him, his voice made me feel hollow inside. I mind my steps this time as I run, not affording to do any more damage to myself. My eye sight was lost again, and as I begin to slow my run, I trip over something. Hitting face first, I feel my nose begin to bleed at the force of my nose smashing against thick oak wood, I stay on the ground; all energy lost from the run. I was weak, and my body has gone into shut down.

“M-um.” Daniel whimpers from in front of me. Did he think I was his mum? I begin to move, so I could stand up and talk to him. Light is beaming through behind him, and his face is marked with tear stains, that run through his dusty face. He runs towards me, I get ready to back him off me, but he runs straight pass me and to something behind on the floor. I swivel round, and instantly regret it. I bring my hand to my mouth, as I gag at the sight in front of me. It was Zara.

Her head was demolished from her body; her eyes still open. I try to drag my eyes away from travelling down her body, but all I see is blood – blood – blood; it was everywhere. I turn away and begin to run as I feel bile in my throat. I get less than a foot away, when I see Thomas; splattered against the floor; in pieces from the blast.

I hear Daniel sob and as much as I hate him, it hurts me to hear him that way, with all the strength I have, I turn around and head back to Daniel. Once there I try and pry him away from his mother’s body, but he resists and I stop; he needs time I think to myself. However, I know spending more time in this wreckage could kill us, the building was on its last thread and it could collapse at any moment. I give him his time though, but eventually we will have to get out of this house.

I stand a couple of spaces away from him, to give him some privacy; I’m soon lost in my own thoughts though. I could go home, to my parents I think to myself, get to be with them again. Maybe the new government won’t know of, my parent’s new born child or the fact of my existence. I begin a happy party in my head, at the thought of being reunited with my family. I shouldn’t though, I was surrounded by death and was with someone who had just lost his parents; forever. I look over at Daniel, not knowing how to pry him away, the building has got louder and the creaking isn’t good. To prove my point, a slab falls a few feet away, as the sounds increase. I walk over to Daniel and kneel beside him. “Come on, we have to go.” I say to him, as I grab his elbow and try to pull him away.

“Get off me!” He says through his chokes. I kneel there not knowing what I should do, I was never good with deaths; human deaths of course. I look at Zara’s face and know what I must do, but could I do it? I don’t know, it was to save mine and Daniel’s life’s, so as I lean forward I forget about what I am doing; I pretend it’s an animal in front of me, as my fingers reach out and close Zara’s eyes. Her skin is as cold as ice, beneath my warm fingers and as I open my eyes, I move my fingers away. “Come on Daniel, she’s gone to rest.” I say hoping this time, he won’t resist, because at any moment the ceiling will crumble on top of us. I pull on his arm and he allows me to take him, I drag his body through the wreckage and as I reach the light; I can’t wait to see my parents.

As I get closer to the light, I see the guards dismantled bodies laid upon the ground – Jude I think to myself in a panic. Though when I look up; the thoughts of him are gone from my mind, as my parents enter my head. The whole village was on fire.