Breaking Hope (Finding Sky edit)

Chapter 37

I slowly dragged myself out of a deep slumber quite early in the morning. When the whole family decided it was a good time to go sleep, everyone went their separate way. Finn and Sara had departed the house, being unable to find someone they could trust to open up the business premises the next morning. They both travelled back to Breckendale that night, texting us when they got home safely. Kieran and Isaac had also left, heading a few blocks down to their flat. There was no point in them staying over, and they assured us we were safe here. So it left us with only the younger brothers to house. Liam let Oscar and myself to stay in his room, whilst he sleeps top-tailing with Jac in the room next door. Matt was asleep in a camp bed next door, whilst Nate had the futon in the living room. Ella who simply said she wouldn't sleep tonight would probably still be in the office.

When I was slightly more conscious, I realised I was laying on something hard. I did a double take when I realised I had managed to fall asleep on Oscar's chest and he just let me lay there as he also fell asleep. I was in the slight ridge in his shoulder, one hand caught under his shoulder blade and the other resting on his chest. One of his arms was around my back and gently holding my waist whilst the other held my arm softly. I smiled as I felt more... at home here, almost like there was always a piece of the jigsaw missing within me and whilst that piece may never be found again, this was a bloody good substitute. But even though I felt at home asleep with him holding me, and everything seemed completely at peace and the world remained silent, I was restless. Why?

My memories managed to unravel themselves in my slumber.

I remembered exactly what happened, piece by piece. Ella and I were lured down the pathway as we both felt compelled to walk, and Reed and his security guard drugged me and shot Ella. I remembered the plane ride to Vegas and waking up on the window seat. Flicking through the loose leaf photos of me as a kid in that folder Reed had. The small room with the deep and meaningful conversation with Lucy, and contacting Oscar. Before the second confrontation, where Antonio and David tied me up and forced the falsified memories in my head however they never actually set properly. Almost like jelly that had too much water added to the sachet mix - at the top it could have almost worked but the second you dig deeper you realise the deceptive top. Under Lucy's instructions I locked the important stuff about Oscar away in a box in the river in my brain. It never set properly in my head because that box was dying to be unlocked. And thanks to the events of tonight, that box is now open and I can see the events as a truthful picture - and it disgusted me.

Wanting to share this golden moment with someone, I considered waking Oscar up but I couldn't bring myself too it. He must have been shattered - he hasn't slept since I went missing nearly a week ago. I couldn't do that. I could just tell someone who's already awake - I'm sure Ella would want to know I'm okay.

Slowly, and almost inperceivibly, I wriggled myself out of Oscars grasp and out of the King sized bed altogether and opened the door to walk into the lounge. Sure enough, Nate was on the sofa bed fast asleep, his glasses on the coffee table. I didn't want to wake him, it seemed unfair and childish. However, up the stairs leading to the front door I saw a small slither of light where a room where someone was in had the lamp on. My prediction was right; Ella had been unable to sleep and sat and did work instead. No wonder why she can work so much and have school AND get top grades - she probably uses her vacant nights to study. Slowly, I padded across the perimeter of the lounge to walk up the side of the stairs. I hovered slightly, peeping in the door to make sure it was Ella.

Sure enough I saw her hunched over a desk, headphones in and twiddling a pencil whilst scanning a page of the textbook that was on her desk. I quietly knocked but she didn't respond so I just pushed the door open. She jumped slightly, pulling out her headphones and turning down the volume dramatically.

'Why are you up; it's hella early?' Ella asked.

'I remember what happened, Ella! I can remember everything!'

'Oh, that's good.' She said monotone slightly and I wondered what had got into her. It seemed completely out of character and honestly, she didn't seem as lively as normal. Even when she was down or was completely swamped with work, she always had that spark of life that made her, well, it made her Ella. But it was almost like that spark of life that she always had was completely snuffed out. She wasn't herself; it was almost like someone else was controlling her – making her act in a way that wasn't unique for her. 'I think we should go for a walk.'

'A walk this time in the morning?' I questioned. She had previously told me she had to run when the sun was down like she was running from the demons that she had witnesses. Whilst it was dark, it propelled her through the dim hours of the morning. She would never walk – all types of things can creep up on you when you walk. It's always a run in the morning. It always a run from the Demons, but a walk to the grave. As Ella darkly joked in English but now it seemed almost... literal?

'Yes. I think we should go for a walk.' Ella said, walking out of the office dropping the pen on the floor before balling her fists up.

'Ella, what's wrong, this isn't like you.'

'I just want to go for a walk.' She said, managing to put on a pair of Nike running shoes. But as she knelt down to tie her shoelaces, her hands were still bundled into clenched fists that hovered inert above her shoes, and I realised exactly what was happening.

When I was kidnapped, we were led down that pathway. But not by bait, or not by physical bait. We were mentally persuaded. That night that Ella, Lucy and I all sat awake in the High Dependency Unit we discussed what we felt. We knew what we were doing was wrong and we were under influence so to speak. Lucy vouched, saying that was part of her Dad's gift. He can change the thoughts, but also he can control your body. He can freeze you in what feels like cement, so you cannot move. But he can also persuade you to say things you don't mean, and be prisoner in your own body. He can control what you say, and how you move. No one has managed to fight free from it – not until Ella came along. She demonstrated to David live that she could wriggle free from this grasp, and he got annoyed that a female was better than him, and shot her.

Ella wasn't acting herself because she didn't have control of her body. Whilst in turn meant David was near enough to force Ella to say this. Do I alert the brothers to this madness? Do I wake Oscar, screaming that Ella isn't normal and she's under hostage? Or do I just go along with it, and show David that my mind was as he left it and I still believed his lies, hoping that I could get a message across.

My mind was conflicted, and then I focused on Ella's hands. They were still balled in fists shaking slightly as I guessed her temperature plummeted, and I moved me eyes up to meet hers. That spark of life was back, and she raised her eyebrows. Sure enough, she was learning how to fight the gift of David and had managed to gain some sense of normality back. I shrugged, as if asking her what do we do and she smiled a lopsided gentle smile which gave me comfort.

'We go for a walk.' Ella said, and pointed towards the doors. Ella's had years of working in the FBI and the secret service in England. She was more experienced than I was, so even in her persuaded mind state I knew I could trust her.

'Okay, let's go for a walk then. Do you know where we're going?'

'Just outside. Get some air.' She said, monotone again. I could assume that David had a grip of her somehow, and was trying to drive us out into the open where it was silent, and no one would notice us gone. None of the brothers were up – I had to face this with only half of Ella as the other half was being locked in her brain. So I slipped on my shoes and in my makeshift pyjamas of baggy running bottoms and a vest top, and followed Ella silently down seven flights of stairs to the lobby.