Milk and Brownies (bwwm)

Twelve

The air held a bit of frost to its touch. The night really felt cold compared to the hot scorching day. Ive been zoning in and out all day.

Was it really a good idea to give them a second chance? I knew deep down I'd always still love them but, I also knew this whole ordeal made me a slightly more bitter person.

The what if and uncertainty kept running through my head like it was track season and someone had just shot the gun. I knew what it was but I refused to say it out loud.

Fear.

It clung to my bones and spirit and I feared every decision and its butterfly effect. Clouding my mind making me wonder would I ever feel happy or safe again. And the only answer was dark snarling no.

I realized that meg was sleep and the opera was ending. Yet even in this peaceful space I still clutched the steering wheel like a life line.

No matter how old I get I will never understand how men have the power to utterly ruin and sully you. Yet when a woman does it the bastards can brush it off them like a crumb on their expensive suit jacket.

Up ahead and the giant old gate came into sight. I took inna much needed breath and released it slowly. I pulled up to the call box by the gate and entered the numbers.

The heavy mass of metal slowly yet fluently glided open. I drove the short drive up to the front doors. No need to park in the garage. Just in case I needed to make a quick get away. Definitely since the last time I set foot in this mansion I lost everything.

Shaking myself off I hopped out of my jeep and went around to get Meg. She mumbled but settled back against my body, drifting once back into sleep. The blissful moments only a child could have.

I knocked on the thick wood doors, but before I could finish they flew open and I was lifted and engulfed in muscle. Meg and all.

Enoc slightly shook as he held me. I rubbed his back with my free hand. Even if I was mad at him Enoc would always be a gentle giant. He's hard not to love.

"Mmm....erg..hukpaf!!!" Came a muffled yelp from between us. Pulling back we both stared at a red faced Meg. "I don't want to ever be in a group hug with you people"

I just giggled at her pouting face. It was too damn cute.looking back up to Enoc he was smiling as he tapped Megs nose. He even took her from me and grabbed my hand.

We walked into the living room, where Axel and Mark set in the corner debating. While Zander layed in front of the fireplace. He looked sleep yet he managed to keep the beer in his hand from tipping over.

"Yo!" Enoc shouted to get the guys attention.

Their heads whipped around in our direction. Axel just smiled widely. Mark looked like he'd seen a ghost. And Zander, he sat up swiftly and just stared.

"Umm hi guys" I waved. Still nothing happened. Meg laid her hand on my face.

"Mommy I don't think they are all there" she whispered but obviously they heard her because Mark stared laughing. Zander had stood up and started to approach us. Luckily Enoc was holding Meg becat Zander picked me up and twirled me around.

He set me down and started putting kisses all over my face. I was surprised. I never took Z as the overly affectionate kind, more of the I love it rough breed.

"We missed you. Ugh and you look different. Good different. Not that you didn't look perfect before. You've always been perfect." I covered his mouth. Zander tripping over his words. Today was definitely weird.

"Shhh. I'm glad to be back, but I am beyond livid. You guys will be making it up to me. So when I say jump. You better say how high and would you like massage with that.... OK?" He nodded his head.

Axel walked and pecked my cheek and started to poke Meg. Mark stood back as if he were afraid to approach me. I held my hand out and rushed to me burying his face in my neck.

"Ugh! Will you get away. Mommy!! I'm hungry." Meg cried swatting at Enoc and Axel.

"Leave the child be. Let's feed the ladies." Zander snatched Meg up and carried her under his arm. "Enoc call him back home?" He looked at Meg then nodded his head.

I started to follow but Mark was still wrapped around me. He slid down to his knees and looked up at me.

"I'm sorry. I should have told you but I was a coward and thought vitvwas irrelevant to tell you. Instead I hurt you and my brothers. I do love you. And I would give anything to have your trust back, but I know I have to earn it again. So I don't care what I have to do. As long as you'll say you'll stay." He looked at me with tears running down his face.

I cupped his face and stroked his hair. "Mark it will take time for me to trust you guys again. But I never did stop loving you. Even though Zander is a SECRET AGENT!!" I yelled it so he could hear. " And I'm pretty sure you guys are too? Im going to stay, but only if you make it worth it."

He vigorously nodded his head and placed his face against my stomach. He was taking deep breaths. He changed his position to balancing on the balls of his feet. Then he shot up, drapping me over his shoulder in the process.

"OK baby we are now yours to comand but first. We're going to feed you"

Rolling my eyes I knew this was just the start.