Opposites Attract

Chapter Twenty-Four

Chapter Twenty-Four

Little or No Composure

Hailey Jane Rexler

Black spots blurred my hazy vision. To put things in a literal sense, I felt like a ton of bricks. I lay cold, motionless on a cement floor. No binding, no restrictions, but immobile all the same.

There have been moments in my life where I've felt alone before. But never like this. When I stayed with my distant Aunt Belle's pack for a month in the summer... I felt alone. When I was forced to stay confined to my room during the summer solstice festival under grounding... I felt alone. But now... not only was I away from people and places I was familiar to, but I was alone without myself.

First off it was empty without my other half, especially after my little epiphany. Drew was and always will be my other half. And right now I was alone without him. Feeling not at all like the previous fulfillment of distant yet smoldering embers, but now a damp pile of cold grey ashes. Second off, I was alone without both halves. Because as I lay there I realized that not only was I alone without Drew, my other half, but I was alone without the half I'd always had.

So, still and alone, I lay in the dim light, sucking in cold empty breaths and letting out the same weightless air over and over again. Barely moving, barely living. I felt like beating my self up, twice, even three times over, just for giving up. But I knew I hadn't had that moment of decision, no fight or flight, I was only given one option. And so I succumbed. Besides, I knew that in my immobile lifeless state I could lift a finger, hardly contending with my own body to fight over breaths of shaky stale air, nonetheless beating myself or anyone up for that matter.

Suddenly, my vision sharpened in the least, the tiny patches of darkness fading from my sight. Although the light in the room was only brigtened by the slightest fraction, it felt as if he entire blazing sun had illuminated my path.

The room around me so much resembled a basement, but a large open gap in the wall revealed ground level. Still pines and breeze that was not cold nor warm. No subtle hints of motion or life let me know I was still very much alone.

So instead of acting like a prick and wallowing in my own despair until I innevitably starved to death, I thought. Because thinking was something I knew I could always do, no matter what physical or emotional state I was in. Even if my thought weren't coherent or sane, they would still always be there.

I wasn't always an only child you know. Well actually, you don't. In werewolf genetics it's set in stone. The first child conceived is always a male.... always. Thus allowing a strong alpha-male to be born to the pack to become next-in-line for alpha. I am unheard of.

Before you skip to conclusions, I am not some rare prodigal case. Alas! The wondrous female alpha has defied the laws of the universe and has been born into our undeserving world! No shit like that. I was not the first born.

Before me, barely four years my senior, another was born. His name was Jasper. My heart ached at the thought of him. I missed Jazz so much.

We were so different, yet so alike. Our looks were paired almost identically, dark hair, emerald eyes, all the fixings. But our personalities couldn't have clashed more.

Jasper was the golden boy. The favorite child. He was outgoing and daring- and kind overall. That's what made him better. No matter how popular and perfect and over the top Jasper was, he was never snobby, or arrogant or rude. He was always kind and selfless and helpful. He had no enemies. The amazing thing that even the people who were green with envy of him couldn't bring themselves to hate him.

I on the other hand... well... I've always been just me. A rebel and a dreamer by nature I automatically paired myself with the outcasts and the loners, living with an omega personality most my life. I was always kind to the weak and helpless, caring and understanding of those who thought they had it worse.