Phantom Pain (trilogy)

Sympathy For the Devil

Chapter 34: Sympathy For the Devil

The first piece of furnishings was an area that looked like a nest, in one corner of the room. In the other was a book shelf.

The second was in the centre. There sat an impressive wooden desk. At it sat Penemue, writing in a book with an ink pen.

"You heard his plan then?" he asked me.

I nodded. "He is being strangely kind. I do not trust it."

"Excellent. Never trust him. To be trustworthy goes against everything he represents." Penemue got to his feet. "Though I have been with him for some time now. I have been doing my best to read him, to understand his plan. He is still an angel; more so than those who followed him, who were caught in the blast. In some twisted way I think he missed me." Penemue laughed. "It is bizarre."

"It kept you alive," I said.

"I remind him of Micheal," said Penemue. "Maybe it was the way you killed me."

I winced.

"That can only serve us well, as we attempt to get out of this." Penemue came to stand beside me. "I knew him well once. I have never seen him feel genuine compassion towards anyone other than Micheal. Not even our father. An idea, yes, like the idea of our family, but he can not care for anything more than he cares for himself."

"I know that."

Penemue moved so that he stood directly in front of me, eyes meeting mine directly. "You have to do it, brother. You have to help him bring back Micheal."

"But-"

"It will return balance. I know you can see it. In a way—and Cassiel believes this as well—I think the fall was necessary. I believe it is what God intended, but for every piece of darkness there must be an equivalent in light. Lucifer can continue to exist. No, he must. But a respect must be built between the two sides, a partnership. So blinded are Gabriel and the angels by hate and revenge that they can not see this. They are darkness in this respect, and it casts a shadow over everything."

"And Micheal will fix this?"

Back in the day, I knew how I would have responded to Penemue speaking like this. It was treason. No, it was worse than treason. No matter what Cassiel thought, he was in the minority in heaven.

"Yes," said Penemue. "He and Lucifer were brothers, and they will be brothers again. He was very wise. I do not know if you remember. He will see the scales that the other archangels have lost site of. And this golden age..." He paused, like a preacher paused in the middle of a sermon, caught up in the power of what he was saying. "We are the only ones in the position to bring it into being. And we have to, Ramiel. We have to fix this world our father has left us. It is all we have."

"And it will bring you back," I said, grudgingly. "He said that he will let you leave. I do not know if I trust him, but I think that is a chance I am willing to take."

No. No, I hadn't meant to say that. I hadn't meant to think that. I couldn't. I couldn't be thinking about going through with this.

Penemue hugged me. "Thank you."

The whirlwind in my head died down to a breeze. He may not have been there in full but he felt solid in my arms.

"Sleep." He ran a hand through my hair. "You look like you are going to collapse on your feet."

My head lay in the space between his collar bone and neck, my nose squished against his skin. He was practically holding me upright. He was right. I was exhausted.