The Love I Was Looking For (Halal love story)

||Chapter 23: A New Year||

Having the summer almost over, it felt like 100 years. It hasn't been the summer I thought of, instead it's been the lamest one yet. I look at my phone to see the time, and it's 3:05 AM. 

I get out of bed and turn on my lamp. I go to the bathroom to do wudu for Tahajjud. Everyday before Fajr I started praying Tahajjud. 

It's because in a hadith, "Abu Huraira reported: The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings be upon him, said, "Our Lord Almighty descends to the lowest heaven in the last third of every night, saying: Who is calling upon Me that I may answer him? Who is asking from Me that I may give him? Who is seeking My forgiveness that I may forgive him?"

 It is also said that, "the dua made at tahajjud is like an arrow which does not miss its target",  Imam Ash-Shafi'i. I make sure to get up every night for to make dua for the things I struggle in life and especially for Sajid. 

It's been weeks and almost a whole month since I haven't heard back from him, and I'm worried sick. I miss him so much it hurts so badly. Praying tahajjud gives me ease, Allah (swt) knows our love for each other is for his sake and very pure.

So inshallah, he will reunite us again soon. Putting my janimaz down, I pray 6 rakaats in total breaking them up in 2 each and making dua before I start the next set. I ask Allah for forgiveness and mercy, I ask him to help me through out my life and others who are suffering more than me. I ask for a future with Sajid, for us to get married and start a family, to travel the world. 

I want him to be written next to me, 50,000 years before the sky was introduced to the sea. Soulmates before we were on earth. My other half in this dunya wal akhirah (world and the next). 

I get up and put my janimaz away, again looking through my phone I see not a single notification from him. I sigh and turn off my phone and put it aside and reach for my Quran opening it to the page where I left off. 

Starting off with Bismillah, I start to read surah Al-Mulk. In a hadith, it was mentioned that the Prophet Muhammad (saw) recommended reading Surah Mulk every night before going to bed. By doing so, it is said that you would be protected from the torment in the grave.

Abdullah bin Mas'ud narrates that "whoever recites Surah Al-Mulk every night, Allah will prevent the punishment of grave by this Surah". According to another tradition, when a person reads before sleeping, an angel comes down to protect him because he is not able to protect himself due to sleep.

After finishing the surah I make dua once again for everything I want hoping Allah (swt) answers soon. I place my Quran down and turn off the lamp to sleep. 

I wake up around 5:45 AM to do wudu once more and pray Fajr. I felt kind of tired so after I just passed out again and woke up around 10:30 AM. Going downstairs after my morning routine, I make breakfast for myself since no one else is up yet.

I look at the date, and it's August 2nd. I just realize that school starts on the 10th. As I scroll through my phone my mom comes out from her room. "Assalam Walakum, Aisha", she says going into the kitchen. 

"Walakum Salam", I reply back getting up and walking towards her. I showed her my school calendar. 

"School 8 din main sharooh hori hi" (School is starting in 8 days). "Supply list hi?"(is there a supply list?), she asks as she makes breakfast. I look on the school's website, and show her the senior supply list. 

"Chalo, Walmart  jate hain jab Aya aur Isa jag raha hi" (let's go to Walmart when Aya and isa are awake), she says. 

I agree and pull up Aya's and Isa's supply list to along with mine. Might as well have them all ready for when we go. 

A few hours later we head to Walmart with my siblings and we split up to get the things we need. It was honestly packed, like families running here and there just for school supplies. Half of the stationary was already gone but we got what we could.

Having my senior orientation three days later, I was kind of excited. My last year of high school is finally here. 

Waiting for those 3 days , my mom and I left 15 minutes early just to find a parking in front of the  auditorium. The orientation started moments later mainly talking about rules and regulations, grades, and general senior information. 

At the end of the orientation councils were giving out senior schedules, I got in line to get mine. Mr. William's is still council and he was happy to see me return to Norman High School.  

I get my schedule from him and go back to my mom showing her. "Let's see... First period is Honors English, Astrology, Fashion, Lunch, Economics, Marketing, Algebra 2, and Avid". I like the classes I got since I requested them. 

We both go home and organize the supplies for each class. The night right before school, I talk to Allah (swt). Ya Allah, Ya Rub, please make this year easy for me, I ask. Please let me do well in my studies to graduate and achieve my goals and to become a better Muslim. I ask for guidance and protection from haram. 

I ask to surrounded by good people and for Sajid to one day return to me in a halal way. For us to be reunited and both of our parents accept one another. For us to get our nikkah done soon and be together forever. 

These are my dua's to you Ya Allah,  please accept them soon... Ameen.