Eva Buckley

Buck Begins

Following on from the last chapter.
M: He was 7 when you two were born. He was gone a year later. That's why you don't remember him.
Evan: How did he die?
M: Juvenile leukemia. He got sick right after that photo was taken. Our lives changed forever after that. Three years of doctors and hospitals, every treatment they could find but nothing worked.
Evan: I dont understand why no one told us. I mean, we had a brother.
M: They were in shock, after he died. They packed up his things. We moved to a new town. They made me promise never to tell you.
Evan: No, it doesn't make any sense.
M: They were grieving. I think they still are.
Evan: So we were born, in the middle of all of that... of him being sick.
M: Yeah.
Evan: Leukemia. I'm... I'm surprised they didn't try a bone marrow transplant.
M: None of is were a match. Not dad, not mom... not me.
Evan: They couldn't find a match. So they made one, and ended up with twins.
M: Evan you were a match. But then the cells didn't graft. Daniel had a relapse. I wanted to tell you so many times. But the more time that went by, it just got harder, you know? And I'm so sorry. Evan please don't leave. Just talk to me. Eva? You okay?
E: I can't do this mads not right now.
Eva walks out packs a bag and goes to Eddie's when Buck isn't there she goes to his apartment. Maddie's pov for a little bit.
Margaret: What were you thinking?
M: That my brother and sister felt unloved and alone, and I didn't want them to think it was their fault, so I told them.
Margaret: Well, it wasn't your place.
M: I'm not a kid anymore. You can't tell me my place.
Phillip: Watch the way you speak to your mother. This isn't her fault.
M: Its not mine either. You know, it wasn't my decision to pack up my dead brother's things, move to a new town, and pretend like he never existed.
Phillip: We didn't have a choice. You don't remember what it was like. The way people looked at us, talked about us, they judged us for having Evan and Eva. And it only got worse after Daniel died. And your mother was in no state to deal with all of that, so I thought, " Lets move." Fresh start for everybody.
Margaret: Your not a mother yet. You don't understand that kind of loss, what it does to you.
M: You disappeared into your grief and left me and the twins to fend for ourselves.
Phillip: Maddie, thats not fair. We tried.
M: Not hard enough.
It's the 118's next shift, Eva is there too. Buck has just finished telling then about everything Back to third person pov:
Eddie: This explains so much about you.
H: Its a miracle that you even survived childhood.
E: He was always so daring, should've know he'd end up doing a job like this.
Eddie: Yeah, its a miracle he survived yesterday.
Evan: It was the only way i could get their attention. Guess now we know why. They never wanted another kid. They just had me for parts. Defective parts, as it turned out.
Eddie: Hey, that's not on you.
Evan: I doubt they would agree.
B: Have you talked to them about it?
Evan: What am I gonna say? " Hey im really sorry about your dead son, but can we just talk about me for a minute?"
E: Hey I need to talk to them I've been googling all night and now I'm convinced that one of the twins could have the gene.
Hen: Daniel wasn't their only kid, you three matter too.
Evan: Sure. Just--just not to them.
C: Sorry I'm late cap. Hey, can we talk in private?
Evan: No need. Come on. They all heard the story.
C: Look, i'm sorry I didn't tell you. Believe me, I wanted to--
Evan: -I get it. Maddie put you in a tough spot. She does that.
C: You need to call her, Buck. She really wants to talk to you. Maybe you could call her?
E: I wish I could Chim but my phones dead I've been up on it all night.
Hen: She's telling the truth its on charge over there.
E: I'll call her in a bit.
Eddie: How are you?
E: I'm scared. What if??
B: Hey don't even think about that.
C: What am I missing.
H: She's been using doctor Google and now she thinks that the twins have the gene.
C: Well me and you both know that they could.....
B: Not the time Chim.
E: I can't even get a hold of Millie, our worlds could fall apart any minute and she's not answering.
Once the team has gone out on the call.
E: Maddie!
M: Hey, I was coming to yours next I sware.
E: It's okay im here so.
M: Are you okay?
E: Not really, its my own fault.
M: Whats been going on?
E: I went on Google didn't I? big mistake.
M: Oh no, are we okay?
E: I don't know maddie, this is alot.
M: I know. Look I'll give you some time just don't give up on us just yet.
E: I won't.
Once the team gets back minus Buck.
E: What happened?
Eddie: Buck, he went off on his own got lost and couldn't find his way out. He had a patient who was trapped. He was just being Buck none of us were surprised.
E: Well me and the twins are staying here tonight, is that okay?
B: Of course we would love to have you here with us.
The next morning Bobby has gone to pick up Buck.
Eddie: Eva you and Buck have some visitors.
E: Who?
Margaret: Eva...
H: We will give guys some space when Buck gets here.
C: Yeah we can take the twins.
Eddie: I can't believe they're nearly 1 already.
C: We should tell the Buckley's about some of Bucks best bits.
E: Some funny stories about Buck.
H: About how he hated Eddie because he was jealous and now they're best friends.
Eddie: Or the time that he almost got arrested when looking for Maddie and Doug.
C: Or his first day when he came and he was so nervous we all pretended he was in the wrong house then he pissed off Athena and now they're very close.
Cutler: Bobby's on his way back should be pulling up soon.
C: We better get back to work.
Eddie: We've got the twins dont worry about them.
H: I'll see you soon and dont worry whatever happens we'll get through it together.
Evan: Uhh- hi. Hope you weren't... uhm waiting long.
Phillip: The other firefighters were very kind. We got to hear alot of stories about you.
E: Obviously it was all the embarrassing stories.
Margaret: Ha, it wasn't, they seem to like you a great deal.
Evan: Yeah, I uh... I like them too.
Margaret: I dont even know where to start.
Evan: I'm sorry. About Daniel.
E: We both are.
Evan: I can't imagine what that must have felt like, to not be able to save someone you love.
Phillip: Evan--
Evan: Buck. Buck. That is-- that's what people who know me-- that's what they call me.
Phillip: Okay. Buck. You have to know, we never blamed you, either of you. None of this was your fault.
Evan: I still wish I could've done more.
E: We were babies Buck.
Margaret: Buck... you were born to save someone. And thats what you do. Every day. We are so proud of you. All 3 of you mean the world to us I know we've never shown it.
Phillip: I know your both hurting and in shock but apart from that how are you?
Evan: I'm good just shocked, trying to get my head around it.
Margaret: Eva??
E: I'm good.
Evan: Eva talk to us, whats going on?
E: I- uh.....
E: I'm scared for the twins. The gene, they could have the gene Google said that I should get them checked but I can't find any more information.
Margaret: I did the same when Daniel was diagnosed. I learned that Google is not your friend.
E: So people keep saying.
A little bit later.
Evan: Hey have you made up with Maddie yet?
E: Not exactly why?
Evan: Why are you so angry at her apart from the obvious?
E: She knew Buck, she knew there was a chance that one of the boys could inherit the gene she should have told us sooner. Why are you so mad at her apart from the obvious?
Evan: I thought she had abandoned me i needed her and she just gave me the keys to her jeep and sent me away. But Chim just said she did want to but Doug found out and hurt her badly. She tried to tell me, I should have known sooner.
E: So to Maddie's?? Well Chim's??
Evan: Yeah come on.
At the apartment.
M: Hi. Did you...
C: I'm gonna give you guys a minute. Come on Jack and James.
Evan: So Mom and Dad came to the firehouse.
E: Wanted us to forgive them.
Evan&E: We did.
M: Wow. That must have been difficult.
Evan: The thing is, not really. 'Cause its hard to feel betrayed by someone that you didn't really think you could count on anyway. And easy to lash out on the person that you know is always gonna forgive you.
M: I know that I hurt you, both of you. And if I could take it back--
Evan: But I keep thinking about that. What life would be like if I would've known. Would I still be me?
M&E: Oh, I'm pretty sure you would always be Buck.
Evan: Would you, Would you tell us about Daniel? We can't ask Mom and Dad, but we would like to know what he was like.
M: Yeah, Yeah. It would be nice to talk about him again.
Evan: Tell us the truth. We don't have one of these do we?
M: You know what? Both of you stay right there.
E: Open it what's inside.
M: I dont have a box, but here.
Evan: You kept these?
M: Why you thought I would throw them away?
E: What are they?
Evan: My postcards i would send to Maddie. But when she left Doug, she only had two suitcases.
M: And everything that mattered the most was inside them. No matter how hard it got, I always had these. And these. Pictures of all 3 of us and us two girls and a couple of you two. I always had both of you, thats what got me through that marriage.
Evan: We always had each other. All 3 of us.
Eva and Maddie sandwich Buck inbetween them and all laugh at some of the postcards.