Broken Kingdom

18

Stars shone brightly through my window as I twisted once again in my bed. The mattress was too soft, the blanket too hot, the pillow too low for my neck. I tossed the blanket off, a cool breeze immediately hit my skin. I shivered and grunted loudly. With a big swing of my legs I got out of the bed, put on one of the warmer dresses and went for the door. Holden nearly fell into the room due to the force I used to swing the door open. 
"What do you think you're doing?" he whispers. 
"I need to breathe. I'm just going to the gardens," I whisper back, using his unbalanced stance to twirl away from him and fly through the dim halls. The mansion was resting, only a few guards were patrolling. There was something eerie about the silence. Almost unnatural. I heard the hurried steps of heavy boots and knew that Holden followed me, trying to keep up with my pace. 

Once I'm in the gardens I stand somewhere out of sight, close to a tree, and take a deep breath. The air still felt thick, suffocating. My gaze aims towards the sky, stars shimmering distantly. I started reciting stories told to me when I was a little girl. It was one of the few things that could calm me. Holden stood next to me, thankfully being silent. 
"What are you doing, Protector Eira?" he whispers when I don't tear away my eyes from the sky. 
"I'm stargazing," I hum, reliving the stories sung to me back in Drosera. 
"Why? Is something wrong?"
"No, not safety wise. Stargazing calms me."
"And you're not calm?"
"If I were, I would be sleeping in that atrocious thing they call a bed."
"Can I help?"
"No. This is my problem. I'll be fine. I just need to calm my breath and head."
"Okay. So why recite stories? And where did you hear them? I don't think I recognize any."

I chuckle softly, releasing a deep breath before talking. "They are stories of different countries and cultures. I heard them from my father and through merchants. Some I read."
"And why recite them while stargazing?"
"Because the stories are about the stars. Ascanians are one of the very few people that don't have a lot of ties to the stars. Most cultures have legends surrounding them, one way or the other."
"Like Drosera?"
"The witches of the Old Times believed that Drosera was the center of the sky. Stars are one of the most important and holy beings they honored. A few people still turn to the night sky for spiritual guidance."
"Is that what you're doing?" I let out a low laugh. 
"No, definitely not. Spiritual guidance comes from the gods. I don't need their guidance." Holden frowns, deeply, not replying. I look up at the sky, looking at the constellations with wonder. The stars almost flicker in response to my admiration. 

"So how did Drosera react when their princess turned out to have control over those stars?" Holden asks after a silence.
"From what I heard, there were two general reactions. One side was thrilled. They started honoring her by bringing her Midnight lilies, flowers that bloom during moonlight and are native to the country. The other side was scared. Fear caused them to be wary of the girl. But I wouldn't know if it's true. I have never been in Drosera, never got the chance to see where my family's from. I don't even know if I have any family left there."
"Sorry."       
"Don't be. I'm fine. Or I was until this night."
"What happened? If I may be so bold."
"It's the war. Sometimes, when I can't sleep my mind wanders, and it usually wanders towards those days. The battles in Aeris, the Battle of the High Forest, it scarred me. I know that's what war does but I sometimes get suffocated. Especially in smaller rooms or at a place that feels... fake."
"Like here and the palace?"
"The palace I can handle to a certain amount. Somehow, out here nature is suffocating. Too quiet too. It's off. Something's off." 
"How would you know?"
"I observe. But my shadows sense it too."
"That tracks."

We stood in silence again. I turned my gaze to a constellation that shone brighter than usual. I smile softly, quickly stopping myself so Holden wouldn't see. He was looking at me with confusion in his eyes. I sighed deeply, breathing a bit deeper than usual. Taking my time to ease my mind and the shadows that were swirling inside me, more restless than I was. Leaving this mansion was something I was already looking forward to.
"Can you tell me a story? About the stars?" Holden asks softly. 
"What would you like to hear?"
"Is there a Droserian story you'd like to tell?"
"If we're to start there, I would like to start at the very beginning. Now, I am a bit rusty and it's quite a long story. Your choice."
"Tell me."
"Long ago, when the stars were the only things in the sky, eleven friends roamed around the earth. They all came from different corners of the earth, bringing information and talents unique to wherever they came from. And all eleven of them were lost. They either walked off, looking for adventure, or were sent away, or even chased out, and they slowly found each other, one by one."