Soulmates & Twin Flames

11 - I Lost

Was it real?
Is it all in my head?
Am I delusional?

Probably. Because days turn into weeks and Roman doesn't call.

I waited... I waited miserably, hoping he'd show up or least say goodbye. But nothing—just my broken pieces, ashes and embers.

Tell me, Google, why do I feel this way?

The search engine calls our connection "twin flames." One soul split in two, with the flaming pieces cast into the universe, longing to be reunited. They can end up anywhere—in any galaxy, in different time periods or realities. Finding your other half is harder than winning the lottery. But if you're lucky enough meet them, the connection is supposed to be so powerful that nothing else matters. The world, morals, other people—they all fade away.

I thought this was us... but I guess it's not.

Roman told me what I needed to hear at his office to get what he wanted. My feelings don't matter to him. I'm nothing but a fling. A distraction. A meaningless, one-time sex. And the sad thing is, I can't even be mad at him because it was all my fault, not some cosmic connection's. I was too stupid to fall for his lies when he's made it perfectly clear that he wasn't going to break up with his girlfriend—nope, his fiancé... They just announced of their engagement to us, the humble nothingtons of Manhattan, this morning.

I'm sitting by the dining table with my legs folded under my bum while my spoon hovers above a bowl of cereal. The cute couple from the period drama is yelling at each other on the TV but I don't hear them. My eyes are gliding left and right on my phone, reading Roman's news.

'Rhode and Carter families are proud to announce the engagement of Roman and Tiffany.

After dating for two years, Roman Rhode is finally tying the knot with his business partner and the elite's beloved Tiffany Carter.

"Optimus Maximus has always been a family business, and our loving union will help us grow and strenghten our ties," Roman Rhode states. "With our successful launches in both Asia and Middle East, we're happy to spread our footprint to the world. This is an important moment in history. Our children and the next generations will always remember the Rhode family name."

With Carters by his side, we are sure America's most popular men's health magazine will break the charts across the globe. The couple is planning to say yes this summer in Rhode Estate, Upstate New York.'

In the photo, Roman is wearing a tux and his signature constant frown, standing next to Tiffany under a golden chandelier. And Tiffany... Fuck, I wish her smile didn't glow like that. She loves him...which makes me a bigger asshole. The pearl-cut diamond ring on her finger is hard to miss. She looks like a swan in her black ball gown. No wonder why Roman called me flawed. I'm a mess compared to her.

But why a ball gown and a tux?

Then it hits me. The photo must be taken on the night of the movie gala.

Instead of walking out to the terrace and meeting me, Roman returned to the theatre and proposed to her.

I wipe a tear just before it reaches the tip of my nose. Is this why he can't break up with her? Because he'd recently proposed and sealed some sort of business deal with her family? He must have feelings for her, though...right? Would a man in his position marry solely for business?

I guess he would, if he is a heartless robot.

My soul is aching, floating above me like a thundercloud. How can he treat me so low? And what good would come from stupid a deal if it binds you to the wrong person and strips you off your humanity?