Redamancy

42

Every ticking of the time was dreadful. It had been the 10th time Soobin checked her watch and the 5th time for the phone.

15 minutes before afternoon which meant she had been waiting for 45 minutes just to endlessly sigh. Not even a glimpse of Kim Sunwoo was seen from any direction, even her calls remained unanswered, and her messages were left unread.

There was this unusual yet familiar feeling planted from its root inside her chest. A feeling that she refused to develop or think about yet it was forcing her to do so.

Maybe, she had to accept the fact that she was stood up.

But, Soobin wasn't easy to waver by petty things. She would rather speculate many reasons - mostly good things, before finding out the truth. Either to let herself only be engulfed with positivity or she just wanted to gaslight herself.

And she strongly believed it was the second.

She had promised Sunwoo to wait at this park where he found her after Minju's wedding. They were supposed to leave together but it seemed like she would leave alone, by hook or by crook. After all, she still would be going to the place where she intended to take him along for the date even if it meant for her to go alone.

The disappointment was evident in her steps along the path yet her black boot would halt stomping every so often after getting instructed by her brain that still wanted to believe that Sunwoo would come.

"What am I even doing?" She sighed, concreting the decision once again to leave for real as she hugged herself over the long beige coat covering her body.

She counted her steps mindlessly just to distract the voice inside her head. The evil voice was whispering that all this was a DejaVu.

Soobin fished out her car key from her pocket, the chill breeze from the early morning rain did no justice but force her to throw herself inside her car. But, the universe seemed to have a different plan.

"Chae Soobin?"

Someone called and she immediately whipped her head in the direction of the familiarity the voice held. And she found herself in a surprise state upon seeing the person.

Her lips instantly outstretched and her feet spontaneously moved faster towards the lady who had her arms opened widely, preparing the impact from the young girl who now was jogging to crash on her.

Out of all days, Chae Soobin missed her deceased mother a lot today. And seeing the lady across from her a bit had been a remedy to her longing.

"Aunty..."She rested her head over the lady's shoulder, absorbing the warmth.

"How are you, honey?" Sunwoo's mother asked, still holding Soobin between her arms. "Sunwoo told me you were sick. Are you okay now?"

Slowly, breaking the hug, they looked into each others' eyes where Soobin nodded, humming as the answer.

And a sudden thought crossed in her head.

"Is Sunwoo at home?"

Chae Soobin wasn't supposed to ask that. No, she shouldn't have asked. Because the answer given did her nothing but ponder what was going on.

Even as planned - when she did go to the place they were supposed to have the date, the thought of Sunwoo was occupying her head. She just couldn't comprehend why such a thing could make the boy ditch her.

She was supposed to tell him that she wanted to start a relationship with him and that she was ready to reciprocate his feelings. But, out of a sudden, the whole thing made her realize that maybe her decision was wrong.