05. LTNS?

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So, Long Time No See? I'm not gonna use excuses like "I was soo busy" because I did almost nothing these days.

Yes, I'mma be brutally honest here. I know not a lot of people read my blog and I think the main reason is because I haven't been posting regularly.

Like c'mon I posted last year.

I don't know if the time is passing very quickly or that I've dissociated from the reality. I don't even know what I did and what I'm supposed to do. Wait, I hate how I keep saying "I don't know".

I haven't been writing my journal, I haven't been working out, I haven't been drinking green tea, I haven't been properly looking after my hair, heck I haven't been taking care of myself at all.

Where did it go wrong? I thought finally I was doing somewhat well in my life. I had a routine. I studied daily. I drank plenty of water. I was satisfied with what I did.

What happened now then? Frankly speaking, I don't remember how I changed tracks. Guess I just didn't realise it was happening.

Seems like yesterday when I used to do all this good stuff but it's actually been two weeks.

Two Freaking Weeks.

Two weeks of my life just wasted like that. I'm the one to blame here.

But guess what. I'm not giving up. I'm not going to let this demotivate me. Just because I was not practicing self care does not mean I cannot practice it in the future. I know I messed it up but I also know that I have the potential to fix it.

I can and I will.

Sometimes I feel like I'm not the daughter my parents had hoped for. It gets me thinking everytime how other people are better than me.

I would look at a classmate of mine and think that her parents must be so proud of her. The next period, she would come to talk to me and then casually say in between the conversation that how much her parents are gonna lecture her about doing that one thing wrong.

I mean look at what all she's achieving yeah? Not everybody can do that. But they just have to criticize her because of that one small thing that she can't do.

Not everybody is the same. I believe it's okay to be bad at things. It's human nature. Otherwise there won't be a difference between a robot and your child.

I've seen kids with parents that want them to excel in everything.

The other day, a classmate of mine got 16/20 in a test where the average marks range lied between 8 to 12 marks. A friend of his was wishing him saying he got good marks and do you know what he said? He said " What's the point? Through my parents' point of view, I have failed! ".

Do you see how sad and concerning that is? And that kid is one of the highest scorers in a class of 32.

I do cry about my problems but when I see how some parents are treating their kids, it really breaks me. We're only 16. Is it necessary to go THAT hard on us?

I don't know what their intention is but the things I've heard from some of my friends and classmates about how their parents treat them is genuinely heartbreaking.

I don't care what you do in future. If you choose to become a parent, then please be responsible for your child's behaviour.

It's not their fault.

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I got really informal in writing this, didn't I?But Anyways.
Please vote the chapter guys.
It really helps and motivates me.
Also tysm for reading this <3
You guys are the bestest!

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