Sausage's trauma

182 5 2
                                    

Jana: Yup. (The screen showed a couple of pictures of Sausage of Sanctuary, all of him wearing different outfits.) This is Sausage of Sanctuary in his multiple skins. That's the Defender of Sanctuary skin, and his peacetime skin.

Jimmy: You really do like lots of outfits, don't you Sausage?

Katherine: Did I sew them for him?

Jana: No, Maria did.

Sausage: Who's Maria?

Jana: You'll meet her later. Anyway, this is Sausage's lore. (The screen showed the clip of Sausage explaining what happened to him in his old kingdom, and him finding Bubbles and Eddie and Maria. When it was done everyone was quiet for a while.)

Gem: Poor Sausage.

fWhip: Bubbles is in that life too?

Jana: Bubbles is in all of Sausage's lives.

Shrub: Aw, that's sweet. It reminds me of my wolves.

Lizzie: Does that evil king remind anyone of Sausage when he was corrupted?

Sausage: I said I was sorry!

Lizzie: I didn't mean that, I was just asking!

Jana(Hurriedly.): Anyway, Sausage lived in this bamboo jungle place by the sea and was Pirate Joe's neighbor as aforementioned, and he had wood as his export. In fact, I'm pretty sure Joel was the one who gave him the nickname 'Wood Daddy Sausage'.

Jimmy: This is just like the Cod Daddy thing, isn't it Joel?

Joel: What?

Lizzie: You need to be more original.

Gem: Wait, if that evil king was collecting magic and killing anyone else who had it, what about the other emperors who had it?

Shrub: Like the witch!

Scott: Does the magic eye count?

Jana: It's okay, the evil king never bothered anyone other than Sausage. In this life, there wasn't any all-powerful villain like Xornoth who terrorized the whole server.

A couple of people: Phew.

Jana: Anyway, the last emperess-

Sausage: It's Pearl, right?!

Jana: Sorry, Sausage, but Pearl is the goddess of death now, remember? She never had to be reincarnated in that life.

Sasuage(Slumping over.): Okay.

Jana: Don't worry, you'll get to meet her again, just in a different way than you expect.

Sausage(Sitting up hopefully.): Really?

Jana: Yes really. Also, it should be mentioned you had a Church of Santa Perla.

Jimmy: Church of santa what?

Katherine: The Church of Saint Pearl.

Lizzie: I didn't know you understood Spanish.

Jana: Back in Sausage's old kingdom they worshipped Madre de Girasoles, the Mother of Sunflowers, Saint Pearl. It's only right that Sausage made a church for her in Sanctuary.

Scott: Pearl's really getting honored after her death.

fWhip: Wait, but if Pearl's not the twelfth emperor, then who is?

Empires SMP season 1 react to season 2Where stories live. Discover now