4 Nerds Want Lemons

18

Chapter 18

Ryland

Saturday 1:27 am

***

After the boys kissed his forehead and left. I realized that I hadn't done it yet. I leaned down and kissed him gently letting my lips linger a little longer than they should have. He made a sweet moan when I kissed him that he didn't make when the others did. Jay would be more than jealous if he knew that small detail. Jay liked sounds. After another ten minutes I sighed and went back to my room, plopping between Darius and Jay on my bed.

"Where is Sammy?" I asked, noticing he wasn't in the bed.

"Look at the couch." Jay whispered.

I sat up on my elbows to find Sammy talking on FaceTime with a girl. I groaned, throwing a pillow at him. "Go to the bathroom. We are trying to sleep here."

"This is all your fault. If it wasn't a rule to not have sex we'd all be happier people." Jay complained, running his hand down my abs.

I smacked him away. "We are too young for sex, man. And you know what? No one has to listen to me. I'm no one's boss here." They both booed me then giggled.

Darius climbed on top of me, pressing his hands into my chest. Jay lifted my shirt and chuckled when I attempted to get them both off of me by fighting.

"You are the boss though." Darius whispered, leaning down to press his lips against my abs.

 "With the potential to be our Daddy. Don't you like all the praise?"

"Darius, yesterday that would be cute. Today I think you're just digging a grave." I whispered. He smirked.

"I think he deserves a cheat day on his abstinence diet." Jay pouted next to me, kissing my cheek.

"You guys seem to be good at this. You sure you haven't been messing around behind my back?" I knew they had, they knew I knew they had and still they just smirked and didn't answer. And not one person has mentioned Jay's neck.

The bathroom door swung open and a very unhappy Sammy looked at all three of us like we were the devil spawns come to take him to hell. He looked like smoke was about to bellow out of his ear.

"Are you fucking serious? What are you two doing? And why did you wait to do it until I was in the other room?" He screeched.

Jay and Darius both rolled away from me laughing. "Calm down, Sammy. We were just teasing. You know, keeping up the role play." Darius told him. Made me a little sad, but I'd handle it.

"Yeah, exactly. What is it you always say? Oh, yeah. I was pushing Ryland to see if he'd break. I don't know if you noticed. He won't." Jay winked at him. I sighed.

"I don't know. That time you all almost had me." I retorted. It must have been the wrong thing to say though because Sammy was heated.

"I'm not doing this anymore." Sammy declared.

"Not doing what anymore, Mouse?" Darius asked, crawling over me to go to Sammy who was pulling on his black sweatshirt and grabbing his backpack.

"This-" He pointed at the boys then looked at me.

"I-I ...I am leaving the friend group."

I furrowed my brows tilting my head. "The fuck you are. Why?" My tone was harsh, heavy, unknown to me, but commanding and I guess that's where I was coming from, cause the fuck was wrong with him?

"My girlfriend just broke up with me because a) we never get privacy. B) we don't get to fuck even when we are in person, and c) because my friend's are annoying and I follow their rules. And you know what? She's right. I'm an idiot who follows these made up dumb rules that don't even matter. Meanwhile you three just go at it when I'm in the bathroom. And you-" He pointed at me.

"Don't even get me started on how much you'd break every rule for that asshole across the hallway."

These moments, when these three liked to dig at me, I usually prided myself on. I was stoic and calm and could walk all of them off of the ledge if I had to. But being that it was 1 am plus in the morning and all of them seemed to be sex deprived and blaming me for it, I decided to switch tactics. Far be it from me to stop a man from being feral. Or just not a whore I suppose. I stood silently opening the door, waving my hand to it.

"I'm not discussing this. Not debating it or even entertaining it. It's your right to leave, anyone who feels like I'm holding them back and ruining their life can go with him."

All of their faces fell. "You don't mean that. Mouse, does this every three months." Darius teased, hitting my shoulder. I scoffed at him, brushing off where he'd touched me like he gave me a disease. It was meant to hurt and when he frowned I knew I succeeded.

"Fine. I'm going with him. I think Sammy has a point." Darius agreed, grabbing Sammy's hand.

"I-I guess I'll go with them. Leave you alone with your man crush and see what happens on the other side." Jay stuck his chin out in the air.

"Then get to it boys, don't let me cockblock you anymore." I slammed the door behind them after throwing Jay's backpack at him, then I locked the front door behind them.

I didn't cry until I was alone in my room curled up under the blankets like a loser. My chest hurt so bad it felt like someone was ramming me with a semi truck over and over. I didn't know them walking away from me would feel so bad and I didn't even know how we got here. One minute we were almost fucking and the next they were gone. And I truly felt like I didn't do anything wrong this time.

Now what?