Brightwin- Between Us

III.The Catastrophe

Humans are never an appropriate judge of themselves. According to me, they don't fully realise the potential they carry with themselves. When they think they have fully discovered themselves, a new situation comes out of nowhere which sometimes make them act so out of character that it comes as a shocker.

Sometimes it shakes the basic foundation you laid about yourself as a human in your mind. You get to see yourself in a new light which gives you a new perspective to life. Sometimes it can be good, sometimes bad but never fails to teach you something new, something bizzare.

As I stand there in a middle of a room, I realize how much anger, agression I have in myself. How much wrath I can unleash when provoked. This provocation may have come from a person I hold close to my heart but it doesn't make it hurt any less. On the contrary I find myself even more angry. Anger on him, anger on myself, anger on this fucking universe for snatching one thing that I truly longed for and lived for.

As I try to make futile attempts to calm myself down, I get interrupted when I hear a knock on the door. I fully plan to ignore it but as I hear the soft voice that usually provides me so much peace, it stirs my heart a little bit painfully. But soon the anger overtakes.

I ignore it and extend a hand towards the unattended bottle of whiskey that I might have opened earlier when I entered the room and went straight towards the mini bar. Standing on the stage and listening to them was doing nothing to calm the fury inside me so I knew I had to leave.

As I decided to go through the plan of escape, the staff discreetly dismissed the idea of me leaving the stage. Do they think I would be of use to them now? Do they I would stand on this stage and perform further when they know I am in no condition to do that? Do they not have any sympathy? Do they think I am as greedy as them? I simply ignored them and started to move towards the backstage but not before,

'I'll be right back guys', I said into the mike trying to sound as normal as possible before coughing out a few times and subtly left the stage. Win was too busy talking with her girlfriend to notice me which for the umpteenth time brought a fresh wave of tears to my eyes.

Now as I stand here, I realise how I made a fool of myself. Not only I gave people a reason to suspect my actions, I walked out on the concert in the middle of it, breaching the contract I had with the company. Suddenly a laugh burst out of me, not a good kind of laugh but a cruel one, one at my miseries.

I single handedly managed to get my both love and work life destroyed. I don't know which hurts more right now. But as hear the soft yet distressed voice of him once again, I get my answer. As my eyes once again starts to tear up, I shake my head and try to get rid of these tormenting thoughts by taking a swig of whiskey and wobbling towards the golf stick kept on the far end of the room as I itch with the need to destroy everything in sight, I need to release this anger bubbling inside me.

I am slightly unsteady in my steps so as I make a move towards the sofa, my foot gets tangled in one of the legs glass table kept in front of me and I go flying on the table with my back on it which makes a cracking sound before giving out and breaking, sending me straight on the ground. The breaking of glass into a thousand pieces echoes in the room before getting deadly silent. The voices of yelling and screaming outside the door gets drowned out as I hear nothing but a constant ringing in my ears. I clutch my head as the pain starts to spread throughout my body.

I groan and moan in pain as small glass pieces pierce through my back all over when I try to stand up. My head hurts so much, It feels like its gonna explode as my vision turns blurry. I try to make sense of my surroundings, tapping anything in vicinity as I try to get on my feet when I hear the distressed voice of him.

He looks around the room before his panicked eyes connect with my somber ones. I look past him and at the door which I was sure I locked, now lay in a broken mess as he might have broken it to get inside. For a minute I forget I was in pain as he rushes towards me and looks at me as if he is one hurt with so much pain in his eyes, his face concocted in hurt.

He crouches down, takes my right arm and put it around his neck and keeps his other hand on my back and gets me back on my feet which is still wobbly, thanks to the abundant alcohol I consumed. He might be facing slight difficulty as I am putting my entire weight on him but his face is woven in concentration as he looks at my face and body as if to look for any sign of discomfort.

He starts moving and takes me towards the only sofa kept in the room. He gently sits me down on it and moves to take off my shirt to look at damage on my back when I take his hand in mine. He looks at my hand holding his and then at my face.

'Did I hurt you? Do you need something? Can I get-,'

'Move away from me', my thundering voice booms in the room as I push his hand away. He slightly flinches due to the unexpectedness of my actions and look towards me with confusion on his face.

'Bright, you are hurt, let me-, he again goes to say something to me when I interrupt him once again.

'I don't need you, never did and never will. So just get the fuck out of my face' , I surprisingly utter out, I don't know how these words are coming out of mouth but as I see his face concoct into one of hurt, I instantly wanna say take them back but then I remember what he did and I continue to stand my ground.

'You don't mean it. You are just drunk and angry, you won't ever say those words to hurt me ever if sober, I know it. So stop acting like a child and let me help you' , he says softly but in a reprimanding way as if I am child who is being difficult. Has he lost it? He continues to look at me expectantly as if I waiting for my compliance.

'I am not drunk, I can assure you that. So please don't make me repeat myself and get the fuck out before I do something I regret'. I say exasperated with his actions, with his words as I make a move towards another alcohol bottle. As I was just gonna take it, a hand reaches out and pluckes it right out of my reach and keep it further away from me. I look at him with blank expression but once that screams that I don't wanna be mess with but once again the stubborn person he is, he looks at me with determination in his eyes.

'Don't you understand? You can't drink anymore, you are already hurt. Bright, just tell me what happened? Did I do something wrong? Is it about thr surprise? Are you hurt that I didn't tell you sooner? I was just-

'Do you think it is about you not telling me that you have a girlfriend? Oh my god! How blind can you be?' I say shocked at his words. Does he think I would be so affected by him not telling me. 'Wait I should not blame you, I am even more blind than you considering I didn't even get to know that my best friend has a gf' , I say as I scoff , shaking my head as I still reel with the fact that he has a gf and I didn't get to know.

I need to get out of here, I can't stand being in his proximity anymore when I am already a mess. So I stand up and start moving towards the door with out sparing him a glance hoping he gets the hint that I wanna be left alone. I was just about to get of the room when his hand reaches out, catches my wrist and traps me against the wall.