Chapter Eighteen

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Kat Claire:
"He hates me..." Is what I say for the millionth time to my friends, I know the exact reply that I am getting back, yet I can't stop myself from saying it.
"Kat, he doesn't hate you, and if he did, that's his loss, he's your teacher you shouldn't be with him," Cassidy says for the millionth time. That I shouldn't be with him, doesn't mean I can't. The best relationships are the ones that are not allowed.
"He hasn't called back in 6 days, how can he just leave like that? Why did I fall for him... I should've just picked another guy." Hopeless thoughts enter my mind. I did pick another guy some day. I picked Liam, and now Liam is dead. Somewhere it's my fault he's dead. If I just went to prom by myself, Liam would've still been alive, God, I am such a stupid bitch. I hit myself against my head and a single tear falls down my face.
"Baby, I'm right here, I'm sorry I left you for so long, I wish I didn't but I didn't know what to do with myself... I thought this would be better and..." The familiar voice echoes through my head, that's James' voice. Every muscle in my body gets activated. Every bone in my body jumps. My eyes scan around looking for any sign of him. But he isn't there.
"Did you guys hear that?"
"Hear what?"
"I think James is here." My voice sounds way too happy and hopeful, while there is no sign of him to be found.
"Come on Kat, don't act like a crazy person now, we don't want you ending up in the mental hospital now, do we?" Mary says, annoying me. It is not the time to make jokes, I am so sure I heard him.
"He is here! James, please make a sound, say something else." Even begging doesn't make a difference anymore, he is gone again, I don't feel his presence any longer.
He's gone again

--+--+--+--+--+--+--+--+--+--+--

9 days, over 150 hours without James. I can't do this anymore. James was the person I used to look forward to talking. The light in my not-so-bright day, and now I have to learn to live without him forever? I can't do that, I won't do that. Just 7 more hours until I'm going to start looking for James, and I won't stop until I have him in my arms.
There still hasn't been a single smile on my face, not even my friends can make me laugh and smile like they used to, my life feels ruined. If James never comes back, I promised myself never to fall in love again, it ruins me, it destroys me. From the inside out. My friends tell me I'm crazy for behaving this way, but they clearly have never been truly in love themselves.
"Miss Claire, this is the fourth time I have to address you! I would really appreciate it if you would pay attention now or leave my class, which one is it going to be?" My eyes fly open, shit, almost drifted off to sleep again.
"Sorry sir, I'll pay attention." This new teacher that is replacing James until he comes back sucks more than I could imagine. Every girl is sad that James is gone, especially me. Not just the girls, but also some guys, because this new teacher is so incredibly hateful. I would rather have no classes at all, of course I would, every student would.
"Miss Claire! Out of my classroom now!" The fifth time that I lost focus, instead of worrying about me, he kicks me out of his class. Something that James would never do, please let him come back quickly.
Tonight 8 PM.
I gather all of my things at a very slow pace just to annoy him a bit more, the way he annoys me right back, by continuing teaching.
Instead of going to the principal like I am supposed to I make my way down to the cafeteria. Some food right now would be great, just eating to get my mind off these torturing thoughts. To be honest, I can't even remember the last time I had a proper meal, it'll do me much good.
The double doors of the cafeteria swing open as I pass through them, everyone is in class, meaning it's fairly empty, asides from a couple of students studying, looking at their phones, and reading.
My eye gets caught on a single person, he looks too familiar. I move closer to him to make sure I'm not hallucinating. The tables pass at my sides as my pace speeds up. Before I know it, I am right in front of him. Eye to eye.
"What? The..."
This can't be, this is impossible, he can't be here. Did James lie? Am I hallucinating out of hunger? My heart stops beating of a second before it drums back right into my throat, completely out of control.
A flash of white light takes over my vision.

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