The Unusual Interview

Interview One: motorcycleLIV797

1. If you were stranded on top of a mountain with one of your hands missing, a single erasable pen and a chew toy, what would you write on, and what would you write about? Or would you just die?

I’m glad it’s a pen. In that case, I would write on my belly, because then when I jump off the mountain and people find my body, they will be able to see my writing and will be so moved by it that no one will grieve over my loss. And yes, I would jump off the mountain because it would be a waste to just spend the rest of my life on top of a mountain, which may or may not be freezing cold, and I have work to do in the afterlife anyway. I would write an extremely detailed description about the taste of cheeseburgers, because I am always meaning to do that but never have the time.

2. If someone asked you to eat three thousand skittles over the course of two months for one hundred bucks, would you jump at the opportunity, worry about the health risks, or ask if M&M’s would be acceptable instead?

Oh, who cares about the money. Skittles are yummy, though, so I would probably jump at the opportunity. Wait… are the skittles free?

3. What is you username backwards?

797VILelcycrotom, but you could have easily figured that out yourself.

{{yes, but this way you got to figure it out first and laugh at it. ;) }}

4. Would I want to read your book if it was taped to the wall of a building that was slowly filling up with water and I only had ten minutes to escape or I would drown? Why not?

Yes, I think you would want to read my book, because the prologue is about drowning, so who knows? Maybe the ghosts will save you. And if they can’t… well, reading my amazing writing would be a pleasant way to die, in my opinion.

5. What is your main character’s favorite color? Don’t act like you don’t know.

 Izzy’s is yellow, which is weird since she’s such a b****.

6. What kind of underwear does your villain prefer? To wear, not to eat.

Poura is quite the slut. Most likely lacy bras and tiny thongs. Ahh, why did you put this image in my mind?!

{{hahaha!}}

7. Would your main character’s crush win survivor by strength, by cheating, or not at all?

They would both probably win by strength, unless Houston got lazy and decided he couldn’t be bothered. Besides, he can do that cool teleport thing, so why would he even be there?

8. Where do you hide when you’re upset?

When I’m upset, I hide in my room, or just storm around the house yelling and throwing things. But usually I’m in my room, writing my humor story. It always cheers me up.

9. What is the funniest thing you have ever said while experiencing a sugar rush?

I quote, “DON’T STEAL MY TIARA, YOU F***ED UP MONKEY FACE!” It was actually kind of frightening. My poor friend, I think she died of laughter.

10. Do you like waffles?

 Yes. I don’t understand how some people can live without them.