Chapter 12

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"We should probably eat. I'm feeling famished." Liv says. "Shit I'm sorry. Of course." He jumps up still trying to catch his breath. "Let's get you some pancakes." He grabs her hand helping her out of bed. He quickly heads to the kitchen and grabs a plate. He as he gets ready to place the food on the plate he pauses.

"Liv... Slight problem." "What's wrong? She asks quickly emerging from the hallway. He turns and looks her over and smiles amusedly. "These pancakes are ice cold. Maybe we would be better off going and grabbing something ..Ihop? "All I have is a dress." She smiles. "You look great in it." He says teasingly. She exhales. "IHOP it is..." She replies still smiling.

They head to the bedroom and begin dressing. Elliot focuses his eyes on her as she shyly slips the dress on looking away. He chuckles lightly. "I can go change in the bathroom if you want." "No-she says promptly-It's okay."She laughs before looking him over as he pulls his pants on. They lock eyes and she lightly bites her lip. "Zip me? " She asks. "Sure.." he says softly before walking over and positioning himself behind her. Pausing hesitantly. He looks at the small of her back desirably.

He takes the zipper between his fingers as he gazes at her body longingly. He could look at her forever. He could feel his skin against hers forever and it'd never be enough, the feeling electrifying. He finishes zipping the dress and watches as she slowly turns to face him.

"Can't believe you're taking me to IHOP looking like this.." "Like what?" He smiles playfully while putting his shirt on. She looks herself over while sliding her shoes on before looking up at him and raising her eyebrows. "Really?" She smiles. "You look just as stunning as you did yesterday." He says as he smiles flirtatiously-sitting on the bed and putting his shoes on.

They head to the door and he makes sure to lock it behind him. He rushes down the steps beside her walking to the door and opening it motioning for her to step in. They make their way through the traffic and arrive at the local IHOP.

She reaches for the door handle "Agh Agh not so fast." He says as he turns the car off. He quickly jumps out and heads around to her side and opens it for her. Grabbing her hand to help her step up onto the curb. He shuts the door and rests his hand on the small of her back as they walk towards the door. He uses his other hand to grab the door and open it allowing her to walk inside in front of him. He lets the door shut behind them and quickly takes his place by her side again.

They head inside and sit down to order their food. A waitress comes over a few moments later and asks what they would like to drink. "We'll take some coffee-he says as he locks eyes with Liv- we'll also take.. 2 glasses of orange juice.." he tilts his head towards her to confirm. "Yeah." She responds while nodding.

The waitress asks if they're ready to order or if they want to wait. He orders his food and before she has the chance to answer he says. "If I know my partner like I think I do she's going to want pancakes and sausage. Throw in some bacon too." He waits on her to confirm. "Right again." She smiles innocently. Her face beginning to feel warm.

He tilts his head and looks at her rosey cheeks smiling amusedly. "What's wrong Liv?" He says teasingly. "Nothing.." she responds. Shyly looking away. He laughs. "If you say so." Her insides begin to stir. In more ways than she can count. A hot feeling creeping up between her thighs as she imagines his dominance transferring to the bedroom.

"Do you need a glass of water too?" He playfully asks. "I'm fine.. thanks." She says bashfully. After several minutes and a few shy flirty glances-their food arrives. Liv quickly takes a fork in her hands and starts pressing against the stack of pancakes. Elliot watches her-charmed by her care free comfortability around him. He begins eating his own food and they smile- mouths half open as they chew.

They continue eating their food. Elliot tries to strike up a conversation. "I don't want to bring up bad times or anything, but, do you remember when I thought you got shot. She looks up inquisitivly-slightly confused. "Yeah..of course. ?"

"In that moment, I was more terrified than I've ever been in my life. I thought I'd lost the love of my life. When I took you into my arms I never wanted to let you go. I was ready to go file for divorce that day. I still think about it sometimes. The fear. The love. I think about how I was more scared when I thought I lost you than what I was when I thought I'd lost Kathy in the accident the day Eli was born. It's a day that I hate yet hold deeply close to my heart, because in that moment my life was split directly down the middle between before you and after you and it had never been more painfully clear where I wanted to be...needed to be. But how could I break my vows. To Kathy. To the kids."

She quickly looks up from her plate when she hears a very faint sniffle. She looks up to find Elliot with tears in his eyes. "I don't want to ever lose you again Liv, or even think about it. I just wanted you to know that." She pauses still trying to digest everything he said. The slightly broken pieces of her heart still aching from his words as they begin settling back into place.

"I'm really glad you told me. I want you to know that I felt the same way. I'd never longed for you, wanted you, needed you, the way I did when I realized how short life is. How things can change in an instant." They both look each other. Hearts full of ache and love. "Feels like a pretty heavy conversation for an IHOP" she says playfully. "Well I've never been known as someone with great timing." He says through a chuckle. They both laugh their eyes never falling astray from each other's faces. Their faces grow serious as they continue gazing into each other's eyes.

Their phones beep in unison and with a sudden jerk they both advert their gaze and grab their phones before quickly looking back at each other. "Cragen." They mutter completely in sync. "Can we get the check please?" Elliot shouts to the waitress as they both stand. They make sure they have all their belongings before heading quicky out the door to the car. Both of them somehow still finding the time to exchange sweet cutesy looks as he opens the doors for her.

He jumps in the car and makes his way to the station. Neither of them say a word. They both quietly think about what's unfolded the last 24 hours. How now that they've become intimate, no matter how completely worth it, no matter how completely life altering, despite the fact neither of them would ever change a thing about it and in fact can only dream for more with each other, none of it changes the fact that this changes the nature of their partnership, to what extent, they can only wait and find out, the fear of being separated at work mind boggling, almost paralyzing.

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