Practice Makes Perfect (A Romantic Comedy)

Chapter 24

Sometimes you listen to a piece of music and the lyrics really resonate with you. It's as if the song has been written specifically for you; its sole purpose is to teach you a lesson, or wrap you up in a warm comforting hug.

And then there are the tracks you don't identify with at all. For example, there's a song that came out earlier this year: "Red Flags" by Mimi Webb. She details the various things her boyfriend does that immediately flag up crimson. But then in the chorus she's sings "I see the signs but I still come back."

And I remember listening to it frequently during my break from Declan (it was on the radio all the time) thinking "this girl is an idiot if she keeps putting up with this shite."

Oh, irony, you are not my friend.

Because I myself missed so many red flags when it came to Declan. And it's only now, as I lie on my bed, dehydrated from crying, and still a bit devastated over what happened with Ric, that I'm finally starting to see the relationship clearly for what it was.

I had thought everything between us was pretty much perfect. Apart from that weird blip just before Christmas, of course.

But it wasn't really good at all.

I close my swollen eyes and the inside of my eyelids becomes a projector of sorts, replaying memories as if I'm watching them on a big screen, in surround sound. Just give me a tub of popcorn (heavy on the butter, please!) and a massive cup of Coke and I'm ready for the full cinematic experience.

This is it, folks!

I'm finally going to watch The Story of Declan and Abby. The uncut version, without the heart eyes filter in place.

Oh, look, first up, we have that highly anticipated first date after our meet cute. We went to an Italian restaurant in the west end, and I was pretty sure Declan was flirting with the beautiful waitress the whole time. I barely knew him at that point though - maybe he was just being friendly? And my Bullshit Detector was fully disarmed at that point. (I think it needed new batteries, and I'd bought the wrong ones as usual.)

Plus, when we left the restaurant, he made me feel like the only girl in the world. I forgot completely about the waitress as he took me to a cocktail bar, and fully charmed me, without any distractions. And then, of course, we'd ended up spending our first night together.

The waitress incident had apparently been edited out of my memory until now. Instead I'd remembered the compliments he gave me, the sexy smiles, the sweet kisses, and - of course - the incredibly gooey mozzarella sticks that particular restaurant offered as a starter.

Freeze-frame on those mozzarella sticks. Let's watch that cheese-pull in slow-mo. Cue drool.

Up next, we have a bit of a montage, showcasing the frequent times Declan would just go AWOL. It was never for long, one or two days at most, but he'd simply drop off my radar completely, and ignore any calls or messages. I don't think he was doing anything dodgy; he'd usually reappear and apologise, with the excuse that inspiration had struck. And he had usually written approximately five new songs while he was stuck in that impenetrable black hole. "Ferry Girl" was one such track.