2am texting // ziam

mother's day | pt. 2

"zayn....."

she stares into my soul like i am a stranger after 5 years. which actually i am, since she doesn't know what has happened in the past 5 years.

"how did you know i would be here?"

"newspaper still exists"

"dammit, i wasn't ready. you weren't supposed to find me yet. not now zayn" she says nervously and her heels start clicking away.

my mind starts to remember what i was gonna say to her. what i came here for.

"wait!" i yell and got up the stage.

"zayn please...." tears were in her eyes.

i pull my mother into a hug, "happy mother's day"

i let go and she continues to cry and walk away. she turns around one more time, and blows a kiss and mouths goodbye with a smile.

my heart shatters. the last time i heard that, i didn't hear from her for 5 years. but i can't do anything, i can't force her into anything. this is was for me, not for her. i just wanted to see what had become of my mother after five years. but obviously she doesn't.

i run across the field and try to avoid and casualties with the huge crowd. reaching the truck, i feel free like i always do. the thought of having this truck and the ability to drive is a gift for me, and i am thankful for that. thankful that there is a way for me to be able to escape when things i can't control get out of hand.

i climb in and start the engine, hearing it roar to life brings relief as usual. i hit the pedal and begin my trip back home. tears still in my eyes and my heart aching with pain.

it was a short moment, but the best to come out of this entire year. but it's also sad at the same time since i didn't get to spend the time i wanted to with the woman the brought me into this twisted world.

all i wanted was a minute. heck just a simple conversation of how our lives has been would've been great too. i just wanted some time with her, she was just busy living her other life, that apparently i'm not part of yet.

oh gosh how i wish i could just run away unnoticed and comeback when i felt ready.

this is shorter than the last because i didnt want to keep you guys waiting any longer. plus its like 1 in the morning lol