Heart and Soul

19. Without Hesitation (MPOV)

Peter's POV

I whipped around as I realized what she had said. She missed me while I was away?!? Of course, she did, I think to myself. I up and left her at the time she needed me most. I would forever hate myself for abandoning her the way I did.

"Tay, we really should talk about that day," I finally say.

She sighed, "I agree."

"I am so sorry that I abandoned you as I did. I should have been there for you," I apologized.

"You were processing too," she countered.

"Still. We should have been there for each other. It was my fault we weren't. I am so so so sorry that you had to deal with everything on your own."

"Peter, I won't lie to you, it was hell, but I made it through. I'm okay now. I have four amazing boys that I would not trade for the world. It was so hard knowing that I would never have kids, but look where I am at. I have four! I know it was hard for you too. We had been talking about our future since we were sixteen. We both wanted kids and I know it was hard to know that we couldn't the biological way."

"I really wish I would have handled it differently," I said, mostly to myself.

Here I was, ten years later, without a wife, kids, job, or even house. I let my emotions get the best of me and I have paid for it since.

"I think it was meant to happen this way," she replied, "Everything happens for a reason. I am content with the life I have had since, so don't feel guilty on my account."

That reassured me some. At least she was happy. I gave her a small smile. Turning back toward the stove, I realized that I was about to burn everything. She came around from the bar and helped me stir everything and finish preparing our lunch. As I plated it, she grabbed us drinks and silverware. We sat down at the table where I started a conversation about her kids.

"So how did each of your boys join your family?" I asked, I had been curious for a while.

"As you know, I kept Brayden quite often when he was little. His dad was away a lot because he was in the military and his mom died when he was twelve. His dad asked my husband and I to keep him when he went to the base. We adopted him after a year of him living with us full-time. His dad did not know when he would be able to come home and in case anything happened to him, I wanted Brayden. He hated it at first, he was terrible. It took Matthew a while to get him to be respectful towards us, but I am so glad that he is my son."

"Is Chris still ...?" I asked.

"Yes. He is retired now. Brayden doesn't get along with him very much and they're not very close. He is still mad that Chris abandoned him when Carol passed."

"I got you. Who was next?"

"Everett. His parents were in an accident that killed them when he was just a year old. He went to live with his grandparents until he was six and they were physically unable to care for him anymore. He went into foster care and bounced around until he found us. Julie, Carter's wife, is the one who suggested that we should take him. She was his social worker."

I nodded as she told me the story. It made even more sense why Everett acted much younger than he was.

"Matthew had already passed and then I tried to add another person to our family. It was a big adjustment for all of us. Brayden was hesitant at first, but he was quickly put under Everett's spell."

I laughed a bit at that. Everett already had me wrapped around his finger and I hadn't known him for very long at all.

"Having the twins move in with us was tough. Brayden and Liam just couldn't get along. Brayden was pissed at me because I couldn't punish Liam, but he got in trouble. It took him a long time to understand, but he did, eventually. When the adoption was finalized, and Liam earned his first spanking, Brayden and Liam started to get along much better."