"i never stopped loving you barbra, we just never stopped fighting. i stopped liking you, but i never stopped loving you." luke spoke back firmly.
"that's bullshit and you know that too." mom spoke softly.
"mom maybe you can just he- "why are you taking his side indigo? he doesn't deserve it! he's the one who fucking left not me! i was there through everything!" mom yelled as she stood up.
i shrunk back into my seat quickly as tears came into my eyes.
"okay, let's calm down." ashton instructed as he motioned for mom to sit back down.
mom slowly sat back down with tears streaming down her face.
"luke continue." ashton offered as he sat back.
"i left for a lot of reasons indigo. my job was one of them. i got an offer to work in the states, who wouldn't take that. so i went. your mother and i were always fighting and it was just, really difficult." luke spoke softly.
"but what about me? you forgot about me?" i whispered with tears now flowing down my face.
"i never forgot about you, i did leave, but i never forgot. i was a kid back then, i wasn't as mature as i am now and you suffered the consequences of that and i'm sorry." luke spoke.
i nodded in response. no point dwelling on the past, i needed to move forward.
"now barbra, if- "no please, i already know what you're going to ask. i'll tell you, but one on one. there's no reason for someone else to know about it." mom spoke softly.
luke gave barbra an odd look before standing up with me right behind him.
barbra's pov
"so- "self harm okay? i used to self harm. i regret it because indigo was the kid cleaning my arms while i couldn't even function." i whispered.
ashton sat quietly in front of me and nodded.
"i'm sorry, that's very tough. i'm sorry no one was there for you. if i could ask, why are you so harsh when indigo mentioned she struggled the way you did?" ashton spoke softly.
"because i didn't want her to be a fuck up like her mother. when she told me she self harmed before i felt my whole fucking world stop. i couldn't even function, i felt so bad. i'm not going to nurture her and tell her it's okay when it's not." i spoke firmly.
"telling her everything is going to be okay isn't nurturing her and egging on her self harm." ashton replied quickly.
"it's most certainly not stopping it either. i rather we just avoid the whole topic." i spoke as i clenched my fists.
ashton sat silently for a moment before responding, "you and i don't have to talk about your self harm, but that doesn't mean i'm not going to talk with her about hers. if she needs a shoulder to cry on about it then i'm more than willing to give it to her whether you are too or not."
"you're not her fucking parent ashton." i spit as i stood up.
"barbra i may not be her parent, but i sure as hell care about her. so does luke and if you can't see that your blind." he spoke calmly as he wrote some stuff down.
"i'm done with this." i muttered as i stood up and walked back to my room.
i needed to get a fucking job.
indigo's pov
i sat upstairs in my room as ashton and my mom talked.
"i don't want to be here." i whispered under my breath.
"why?" luke asked.
"i don't mean like suicide, sorry that was bad context. i meant with you two under the same roof." i spoke softly as i stared at my hands.
"i don't blame you kid, i wouldn't want to either." luke spoke as he swung his arm around my shoulder.
"i almost think we should go back to australia." i spoke softly as i looked him in the eyes.
"what? no, i've missed so much already." luke mumbled as he held me tightly.
"it's not healthy for her though. she's fucking drowning." i whispered as i held him back.
"maybe i can stay here and she goes back, but i doubt she will ever be okay with that." i added.
"you can stay if you want too, you're old enough to decide." luke offered. "we always have an open door for you."
all of a sudden i heard a loud slam from my mom's room and felt my heart sink.
"she's going to go back to australia." i whispered to luke.
"how do you know?" he asked.
"call it intuition."
