Home - COD Simon Ghost Riley X Female OC

Chapter 12

She might have let the ghost kiss her momentary terror away but it settled like an impossible weight on her when he left. Halcon was there, on base, and somehow, so was she. Any hope she'd had of returning to a normal life wound its way out of her through the tears she couldn't seem to shut off once she was alone.

Her father, her sweet, doting, selfless father had lied for all that time. Or had he not known? She held to that possibility so tightly she felt she might bleed.

She recalled her mother coming to her before their death, saying papa was obsessing again. That he was barely speaking to her. MJ had told her mom that the trip to the keys would be good for them. That they could reconnect. She had always hoped they had, that when they had died it was in peace. She wondered if her father, who loved her mother like the sun loved the horizon, had been honest with her. If he had opened up to her about what was in that head of his.

Her mother had always accused MJ of being too much like him, stuck in her mind, fixated on fixing. She never had time to be in love or make real friends, she was too busy studying, searching, solving. She had enough love anyway, from them. She had been devastated when she lost them and once the shock subsided, she was left empty. Her work filled that space. Her vengeance filled it, if that's what she chose to call it.

And hope. Hope for justice. Hope for peace. Hope that someday, someone else could offer her the grace and safety that her family had. That hope had kept her alive, because trapped with Halcon she had realized that it could spread and grow and encompass all that suffered at the hands of the family.

She lay under her blanket, pulled it over her face, pulled her knees into her chest. The hands of the family were her hands, too.

If she had any energy to spare, she might panic. Instead, she was tired, and all she could do was weep. She had thought a lot over the quiet week alone how she might pick back up her work when she left. How all the new things she had learned might help further the case, how she could end this, get these men home, and keep on living. That was gone now. The best she could do would be to offer herself as some sort of sacrifice. If the family needed her because her sister was dying, then maybe she should eliminate herself as an option.

The thought made her sit up and place a hand over her stomach as it rolled. She had gone so long, so hungry, in so much pain, and still wanted to live. Fought for it. She stood and paced. She had thought her will had saved her, but it was her blood in the end.

Her half sister couldn't produce an heir because she didn't have time. She couldn't produce an heir because they didn't have time. That was enough to hang her over the toilet. It was the middle of the day and she hadn't eaten, all that came up was the coffee that hadn't done her any good anyway.

The soldier absolutely should have left her there, chained to the wall. They could have taken Halcon out as they planned before he came back for her and they would have unknowingly eliminated the true threat. She cursed the universe for putting her in his path, she cursed him for wrapping her up and carrying her out. She cursed him for flirting with her. Goddammit. She held her head in her hands on the bathroom floor. She cursed herself for flirting back like the entire foundation hadn't just fallen out beneath her. She was the reason they were there now, in danger, and not packing up to go home.

But he offered her something she couldn't give herself. She needed arms around her, something to hold her together, and the thought that he was the only way she could get that numbed her heart. She had no one else. The half of her that she had just lost prevented her from holding herself.

At some point, she made it back to bed and wrapped the blankets tight around her body. She sought the empty hunger that had burned in her before, fueling her survival. It never came. She was so sick, so full of tears, that she could feel no need for survival at all. She had held on and held on, but once she saw past the confusion and frustration, the news broke her.